Let me be your hero
by J.Angela
Summary: I met her at a café in NYC. For some reason she caught my attention, she drew me in. I wasn't usually this predatory but she was beyond beautiful. Beyond stunning. Beyond anything my imagination could fathom. She just was. Brittany and Santana love story! Brittana end game. A story of love, loss, hope and romance. Can Santana save Brittany? Du dun dun!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is about three years after graduation and Santana now attends NYADA and lives with Kurt and Rachel. She's never met Brittany before, who is also a student at NYADA. It's late August and they are in New York. **

**Please ignore the mistakes, I re-read this like three times but some things you don't catch: / **

***This story contains sexual, physical, and mental violence in later chapters.**

I met her at a café in NYC. For some reason she caught my attention, she drew me in. Which was strange; this was New York City and nothing here is small, this café was abnormally large and pretty full. Not to mention she was sitting on the ground floor, while I watched her from the second floor. Over the banister, I watched her take a seat in the corner and she pulled out a book. Her hair was flipped to one side, spilling over her shoulder; exposing her soft, yet sharp neckline.

I wasn't usually this predatory but she was beyond beautiful. Beyond stunning. Beyond anything my imagination could fathom. She just _was. _She had sparkling blue eyes, and slim pink lips, and blond hair that reminded me of silk. _She_ reminded me of silk.

She was reading Lord of the flies and I smirked. The last time I read that book was my freshmen year of high school. Actually, I thought only high school students read books like that. I took a sip of my coffee and continued to gaze at her. I wasn't the only one taken by her beauty; a few of the men in the café were also gawking at her, although I wasn't even a 3rd of obvious as they were. She either didn't notice or was pretending not to notice the men's comments. That was until one of them made her notice. He was tall, muscular, and tan. He ran his fingers through his much too gelled hair and he flashed her a winning smile. It wasn't a winning smile to me. But I could easily see how some other women would find it attractive, a 14 year old girl; maybe. The women looked uncomfortable as he talked. She kept looking around, checking outside and behind her. She looked almost frightened. He was obviously _trying_ to spit game at her, but he was failing miserably; I took this as my opportunity. I grabbed my coffee, my bag and my lap top and left down the back way so the man wouldn't see me coming down. I walked up to them with a smile on my face. "Hey baby," I placed my hand on her shoulder, taking a risk by touching a women I did not know. She looked at me confused for a while, but then a smile formed on her face. "I'm sorry I'm late, work and all that." I went to sit down in the chair that the man was going to sit in, after shooting him an evil glare. The classic Lopez glare. It's been passed down from generation to generation in my family.

"That's fine; I was just reading to cure my impatience." She played along and took my hand in hers over the table. "I missed you so much," I stopped breathing for a moment; she was much softer than I ever could have thought of. I smiled hard while the man just stuttered; he was at a loss for words.

"Um, ok… you two…" He paused, "You're a-"

"Was I interrupting something, babe?" I asked her a little louder. She shook her head no, squeezing my hand a bit tighter.

"Not at all."

"Good." I turned my attention to him. "You may be gone." I told him a little harsher than I meant to. He gathered what was left of his pride and went back to his own table. She started to giggle and I couldn't wipe the damn smile off my face.

She had the prettiest laugh.

I returned the action before the laugher drifted off in an awkward silence. But I was still smiling. I picked up my bag and my notebooks to leave before things go any weirder. But she still had a hold of my hand. "I think you should stay, he's still here and I don't want him trying to talk to me again. I think you scared him off." I chuckled.

"I'm good at that." I settled back in the chair and it was harder to stop looking at her when she was so close.

"What's your name, _babe_." She mocked. Her tone was dripping with seriousness though. I blushed a little,

"Santana. Santana Lopez." She smiled when I told her my name.

God! That smile. I definitely wanted to make her do that more.

"Yours?" I asked sipping the last of my coffee.

"Brittany Pierce." I chuckled, it fit her. _Brittany_. Sweet, innocent, and beautiful.

"Well, hello Brittany Pierce."

"Hello Santana Lopez."

"Um," I wanted to talk to her. I wanted to know everything about her actually; where she was from, what made her angry, how she liked her eggs in the morning: everything. But then I noticed the pack of peanut butter M&M's on her side of the table.

"I'm absolutely in love with those. They're my current candy obsession." Brittany smiles much wider at me and I felt like my legs were numb.

"Well, then I think." She opens them and spills them on the table; separating them in half and giving me the bigger side. "We should share."

"I-I can't take your M&M's… they're too delicious to just share like that."

"I don't mind. Really, take it as my thanks for saving me."

"Um, ok." I take them off the table and begin eating them one by one. She rests her head in her palm watching me.

"So, do you stay around here?" I shake my head.

"I live about 20 minutes away, but I like to come here when I get out of class."

"What school are you at?"

"I'm currently a student at NYADA so… those are my days off." I laugh. She laughs too. Then she laughs harder and I'm slightly creeped out. But definitely in a good way. "What's so funny?"

"I'm a student at NYADA too." My eyes widen.

"What the mighty fuck, are you serious?"

"Yeah, I just got out of class like an hour ago." We're both smiling now as I pop the last of the M&M's in my mouth.

"So what's your major?"

"Dance," I should have figured with that body… "What's yours?"

"Well… I sing so… like singing. But I take a basic dance and acting class. But everything else is vocal masturbation pretty much." She laughs at that and I swear. That laugh is something I can't get enough of.

"Do you live on campus?" I shook my head.

"No. I actually live with my two best friends; I call them the Olsen Twins because they're so nauseatingly cute and irritating… and they break out into song a lot. But separately they are Hobbit and Lady Hummel." She's still laughing.

"You're honesty is really refreshing. But what are their real names."

"Rachel and Kurt. Both very exhausting to be around."

"So why do you live with them and why are they your best friends?"

"They're two of the top people that have pretty much always been there for me, and despite my honesty they still think the best of me. Um, we met in high school; we were in glee club together, which was pretty much like a big family. When I moved here they let me move in… I mean, I sort of just showed up at their door but…" She shakes her head understanding.

"I wish I had friends like that, so understanding."

"I'm sure you do."

"I'm sure I don't." She insists.

"Well, maybe you could if you… maybe… gave you my number, er gave me your number." I laugh nervously. Smooth Santana. She giggles, then she ask for my phone.

I swear my heart just skipped a beat.

I unlock my phone, typing in my password then I hand it to her. She dials some digits then hands me the phone. Oh god, I'm getting that stinky panic sweat under my boobs. "Maybe we could meet up sometimes before class-"

"Or after."

"Yeah, I'd like that." She then gets text herself and hurries to get up. I watch in wonder as she packs up her notebooks, book and lap top pretty quickly before she mutters.

"I-I-I have to go, I forgot I'm supposed to be meeting someone. I'm sorry, um, text me? So I can have your number. Ok? Text me, don't forget." I give her a smile, how could I forget?

"I won't. I'll do it right now, actually." She nods and like that she leaves the café.

I took the train back to the apartment with the thoughts of Brittany dancing in my head. Why was she so cute, and amazing? Well, I'm not sure if she was amazing… but she seemed damn amazing.

That had to say something.

When I walked into the house Rachel was singing some song from Funny girl. "My god, can I get some damn peace?" I scream over Rachel's voice. Her voice is nice, it really is; but it can get irritating. Kurt emerges from the kitchen,

"Santana, you know she has her audition." I roll my eyes and push pass him.

"Berry, it's bad enough we have vocal classes; shut up!" I said. Rachel Berry and this damn talent of hers killed me every day. Kurt just laughed and followed me into the kitchen.

"You look… different…"

"What the hell are you talking about, Lady Hummel?" I spat. He chuckled again.

"Did you meet someone?" He started beaming, jumping up and down clapping his hands. "That would be awesome if you did, especially after Dani-"

"Please don't mention her…" I stopped him in his vocal tracks. "Seriously, I just moved on…" I stopped talking; I didn't want to talk about Danielle. "I did meet someone though, well no… I met a girl but she might not be into girls…"

"What's her name?"

"Brittany Pierce, she goes to NYADA." Kurt's ears perked up just as fast as his eyes widened.

"Do I know her? Does Rachel know her?" I shrugged me shoulders.

"I just know she's a dance major." At that moment Rachel walked into the kitchen and got a glass of salt water. Once she finished she turned to me with a smile,

"You know," She leaned over the counter, placing both hands on the sides. "Santana, you should gargle salt water. It helps with your vocal cords."

"I don't need any help with my vocal cords, Hobbit."

"Aren't we pass these childish nicknames?"

"You tell me, _man hands_." Rachel sighed and shook off the comment like she always does. "Who's Brittany-"

"Eavesdropper!" I exclaimed. Rachel just smiled at me.

"Spill," I took a deep breath.

"She has blonde hair and blue eyes and she's so gorgeous-"

"She sounds like every other blonde hair and blue eyed girl in America; not special." Rachel commented.

"She sounds like Barbie." Kurt added.

"Rachel, you look remind me of a grown toddler, and Kurt, you look like you belong on America's next top drag." I said getting offended that they were talking about Brittany. Only Brittany is like Barbie 10.0 or something. Barbie is the distant cousin of a rag doll compared to Brittany." They obviously ignored my pervious comments about them because they're both bouncing up and down again.

"OMG Santana you're blushing." I covered my cheeks with my hands and I could feel my face getting hot.

"Am. Not!" I said. Rachel and Kurt shook their heads and began to laugh. When they started to sing I lost it.

"_Santana's got a crush! Santana's got a crush! OMG OMG OMG! Santana's got a crushhhhh!_"

"No! I don't… I just think she's pretty."

"Did you get that stinky panic sweat under your boobs-"

"No!" I said a little too fast. I rolled my eyes when the song started up again. "Olsen twins! This is the end of the musical; I'm going in my room." I waved them and their pleas for me to come back and tell them more off. I needed to think.

Brittany and I had texted once or twice in the last week, I still hadn't seen her at school but I looked out for her every day. It was getting so bad that I thought every blonde was her. And of course I was sadly disappointed when it wasn't her.

It was now five hours after my last class and it was going on 8 pm. I had to perform this song in front of my vocal class that Friday coming up; and it needed to be perfect. So I stayed behind in the studio to work on some vocal exercises. That and Rachel was becoming exhausting with her practices at home. When the clock struck 8 pm I decided that it was time to head back to the apartment, NYC wasn't bad at night because of all the lights and people walking around, but once you got off that train and all the bright, shiny Broadway lights no longer existed; things got dangerous. Grabbing my bag and my bottle of water I headed down the hallway, I was almost to the front door when I heard a Janet Jackson song playing in one of the dance studios. It was one of my favorites.

On my tip toes, I snuck in and my mouth dropped open at the sight; there was Brittany, practically gliding on the floor as she danced. She was much more beautiful than I could have remembered. Her hair hung high in a messy ponytail, a few strands hanging down and framing her face. She wore a pair of yoga pants and bright pink sports bra, she looked so focused. So serious. She went and spun around, but then she fell to the ground. I gasped when I heard her hit the floor and I walked over to her as she laid on the floor in silence. "Are you ok?" I asked. She shook her head, I wasn't sure if she knew it was me of she was just shaking her head.

"He's right. He's so right. I can't even do a damn spin!" I took her arm gently and helped her so she could sit against the large mirrors.

"Who's right?" I asked quietly.

"My boyfriend… Jared. He's right. I can't-"Brittany sobbed. It had never broken my heart so much to see someone cry.

"Brittany," I spoke softly. "I don't know who Jared is or what his problem is but… you were amazing out there. I just watched you-"

"But I can never get that damn spin! Its so simple-"

"That's what practice is for, but you can do it. And like I said, you're fantastic. Seriously," I reached over and turned the music off. "I bet Jared couldn't have moved like that so he's not the one to judge you." Brittany looked over at me and smiled weakly.

"You think I'm amazing."

"Yes, I do." I chuckled a bit and hesitantly pulled her into a hug. "You're fucking amazing." I wiped her tears away and handed her the bottle of water sitting next to me. "Drink something, you're breathing really hard." How could her boyfriend say that to her, or even think it? What kind of boyfriend says that; especially when you have a girlfriend like Brittany? My ex, Puck didn't even treat me like that and we weren't even dating.

"Thanks," It grew quiet between us but I just wanted to look at her. "I'm sorry we had to meet with me like this-"

"You're beautiful." I stuttered out, and I could feel myself blushing from my words. Did I really just say that? Before I could take it back she smiled even brighter.

This girl wanted to kill me with that smile.

Then it hit me. She had a boyfriend.

She has a fucking boyfriend. Not a boy that is a friend. A boyfriend.

So she's not gay.

Just as soon as the thought hits me, my smile fades. "Um, Brittany… I'm going to get going." Her smile fades then too.

"How do you get home?" She asks.

"Uh," I get up and adjust the strap on my bag. "I catch the train-"She jumps up with me, her eyes looking a little less red but were filled with need now.

"Can we walk together? I do too but… all the different letters I always get lost and… it'd be nice if someone could just tell me which train in right." I nod my head.

"Sure."

I noticed how Brittany stayed close to me during our walk. But I wasn't complaining. I loved her being this close to me, I loved how well our bodies moved together while she walked down the street, and I like how she clung to me. "What were you practicing for?" I asked. She shrugged.

"Just practicing… like for fun I guess."

"That's cool; it's always good to get better." We talked the rest of the way to the train station. I'd never been able to talk to anyone so easily before, not even Dani. And when we got to the train station I felt my heart sink; we'd have to separate. "Do you know which train you should get on." Her eyes leave mines and she looks down at her shoes.

"N-No… um, I guess like the B…"

"Where do you live?"

"Gabrielle drive, 20040…." I smiled at her.

"We don't live entirely close to each other… but we definitely take the same train." Her eyes shot up at me and that beautiful smile came back.

"Seriously! That's awesome!" She practically jumped into my arms and I couldn't help but hug her back and laugh a little.

"C'mon, we catch the D train…" I grabbed her hand,

Damn it, she was so soft!

Our train pulled up and we got on, I led her to the back and we sat down side by side. "Trains are so creepy." I whisper to her. Brittany nods her head and scoots closer to me.

"You smell really good." She says to me in that soft, sweet, innocent voice. I blush a little, avoiding her eyes because I know once I look into those blue orbs I'll just smile like a four year old girl that just got a cupcake.

"Thanks," I manage to get out. Considering how close she was, I really just wanted to reach up and kiss her. But I knew that wouldn't be the smartest thing to do at this moment. So I just enjoyed her being near me like she was.

My street came up before her's, but I didn't want her to walk alone. So I just kept walking with her. "Thank you for showing me which train to catch, no one's ever actually told me. They all just said a lot of letters and routes." She said shaking her head.

"Because their asses, they were making it harder than it needed to be." As we walked, our hands kept brushing against each other and sending electric like shocks through my body. We finally reached an apartment building and she smiled and turned to me.

"Where do you live?" She asked a matter-a-factly. I giggle nervously,

"We passed the warehouse I live in about 10 minutes ago… I wanted to make sure you got home safe… so I just kept walking with you." Brittany turned bright red.

"But now you have to walk by yourself."

"It's fine… I'll be fine."

"Can I walk you home?" I laughed louder.

"That defeats the purpose of me walking you…"

"Right…" We smiled at each other in silence before she pulled me into a tight hug. "Thanks again." I returned the hug, melting into Brittany before she pulled away from me.

"Get up stairs," I told her. "It's getting late." She nodded her head and walked away, but our hands stayed tangled until we couldn't hang on anymore.

**The first chapter is short; I want everyone to tell me what they think, so I can keep updating and adding to the story.**

**Give me some suggestions and ideas for future chapters.**

**Reviews, follows and favorites are very much appreciated. **


	2. Dreams

**Thanks so much for all the reviews and follows! OMG like seriously, I'm glad you guys are so interested : )**

**Brittana2014forever: I like San as Brittany's nick name… I'll think about it. And I surely won't forget about their sweet lady kisses when it gets to that point.**

**A/N: When it gets to Santana singing, the bolded italics are her thoughts…**

Since I'd walked Brittany home that night, we'd been sort of inseparable. But not on purpose, I'd be walking down the hall and Brittany would come down the steps and we'd end up walking each other to class or something like.

I'd never felt so connected to someone before. It was like Brittany and I were meant to be friends… maybe more.

But she had a boyfriend. So I would settle for friends… for now.

* * *

"I will love _youuuuu_, unconditionally-"My vocal professor, Cassandra turned the microphone of the studio off and rolled her eyes.

"Um, excuse me. Santana, why the hell are you yelling?"

"I-I'm not…."

"But you are, sweetie. Sing from your throat, your vocal cords."

"But I am…" Cassandra rolled her eyes and chuckled. "I'm singing this song just how the notes are written-"

"Try it again, from the top." She turned the microphone back on.

"On no, did I get too close? Oh did I almost see what's really on the insiddde-"

"How did you get into this school?" I blinked, shocked for a while.

"I auditioned…" I answered quietly.

"Yeah, I get that. You must have had an amateur when you auditioned because from what I'm listening to, you're only good for your little high school glee club-"

"No, I can-"

"You can what? Rachel can nail this song, what can you do?" I was silent; I really didn't know what to say. I was so tired of being compared to Rachel.

"I can sing this song…" I whispered. She chuckled again, turned on her heels and walked out of the room. I shook my head and turned the record button on.

_"Oh no, did I get too close?  
Oh, did I almost see what's really on the inside?  
All your insecurities  
All the dirty laundry  
Never made me blink one time" _

I took a deep breath and kept singing, **_I can do this…_**

_Unconditional, unconditionally  
I will love you unconditionally  
There is no fear now  
Let go and just be free  
I will love you unconditionally_

Come just as you are to me  
Don't need apologies  
Know that you are worthy  
I'll take your bad days with your good  
Walk through the storm I would  
I do it all because I love you, I love you

**_Fuck, I messed up on that note!_**

I brushed it off and tried again,

_Unconditional, unconditionally  
I will love you unconditionally  
There is no fear now  
Let go and just be free  
I will love you unconditionally_

So open up your heart and just let it begin  
Open up your heart and just let it begin  
Open up your heart and just let it begin  
Open up your heart

Acceptance is the key to be  
To be truly free  
Will you do the same for me?

Unconditional, unconditionally  
I will love you unconditionally  
And there is no fear now  
Let go and just be free  
'Cause I will love you unconditionally (oh yeah)  
I will love you (unconditionally)  
I will love you  
I will love you unconditionally"

I smacked the microphone away in frustration, it swung back and forth as I began to walk out of the studio and into the control room; Brittany then walked out of the corner smiling at me. "Um, how long have you been there?"

"Since Cassandra was yelling at you."

"Oh," It got quiet between us before she spoke up.

"I thought you sounded so good, like great. I could never sing like that."

"I was yelling the notes,"

"No you weren't, you had soul. Remember what you told me last week? _You can do this_…" A smile crossed my face slowly.

"Did you come in here just to watch me sing?" I asked with an arched eyebrow, Brittany's cheeks grew bright red and she giggled.

"No… well yes, but I wanted you to come to the café with me? I didn't want to sit alone…" I nodded my head quickly.

"Definitely, let me just grab my stuff."

* * *

It should be illegal to look the way Brittany did. To move the way Brittany moved. Her eyes were fixed on the paper in front of her but I couldn't distract my eyes from her. It seemed impossible. Her silky blonde hair bounced on her shoulders in long curls with a bright blue head band. She wore a long sleeved dress that matched her headband and only made her eyes look even more amazing. "Hey Britt, why do are you wearing long sleeves? It's pretty damn hot outside." Brittany's eyes shot forward and she began to stutter.

"I-I um… I get cold fast…" she finally whispered. I nodded my head as her eyes went back down the paper. A little while later she put it down and into her bag. "Do you want to go get our drinks?" She asked me quietly. I smiled got up, rushing to get to the counter before the couple I saw heading into the café.

"She will have a Caffe Latte with extra foam, a bottle of water and a cinnamon roll." I looked at Brittany with a smile, "Today is your purge day, right?" Brittany shook her head quickly,

"Jared said that I'm getting fat… I don't need any of that… I'll just take the water." I squinted my eyes in disbelief.

"Brittany, the last thing you are is fat! Are you kidding me right now? You work out like three hours a day when you dance, you're probably burning calories by standing here. You deserve to eat something other than a salad and a bottle of water. Jared is crazy." Brittany smiled and nodded her head as she agreed. Today was the only day where she allowed herself off her diet.

"Ok," Brittany started, "And she will have," Brittany pointed to me before continuing, "A white chocolate mocha, with one of those vanilla pound cakes, oh and extra extra whip cream." The cashier nodded and before he could ask I told him,

"I'm paying for it all,"

"Santana-"

"I got it Brittany… I got that job at the spotlight diner."

"Seriously! That's great!" I laugh as the guy gives us our orders.

"Yeah, it is. We worked the schedule out around my classes," My voice trails off when I notice a few of the guys behind the counter blatantly staring at me.

"Excuse me," One of the pubescent boys says walking up to me. "Uh…" He starts to stutter and I roll my eyes knowing where this is going. "My friend's and I were just wondering, um, which of us do you like more? Like who's cuter, and can one of us get your number?" I can't help but chuckle, and I cover my mouth; I'm working on not being rude. But it's so hard. "You're so hot," He added.

"Look, I'm sorry… um but none of you are my type." His smile quickly fades and he's frowning now.

"Seriously?"

"You have no idea." With that I hand Brittany her drink and her food and we head the table.

"If you have to work around your school schedule that means I'll like never see you." Fuck, she was right. "I'll just have to come see you at work." My face lights up; that would be amazing.

"Yeah, ok… I'm sure my boss wouldn't mind. "It gets quiet between us again as we sip our drinks, but as always, Brittany is the first one to speak.

"So what was wrong with them?" She asks. Why was she so pretty, and amazing, and sweet? Her eyes were literally like pure fucking ocean blue, and her skin looked so soft, and she smelled so good… "San?" Shit, had she said something?

"Huh?"

"What was wrong with them?"

"With who?"

"The guys who work here? There's like four of them… no way did you not think any of them were attractive."

"Um, well… they just weren't my type…"

"You didn't even know them." I chuckled, it was now or never.

"They were guys, Britt." She blinked.

"And?"

"_Guys_ aren't my type."

"Oh," She said, but then it must have actually clicked in her head because her mouth dropped open. "You like girls?" Brittany whispered as if it were some big secret. I laughed a little harder.

"It's not a big thing Britt,"

"No, no it's not… but you like girls." She said again, putting emphasis on the word girls.

"Is it like, a problem?" Her eyes go wider,

"No! No! You're like my best friend, I don't care that you're not into boys…" I smile,

"Best friends?"

"Yeah, we're best friends, right?" I nod my head quickly,

"Of course we are… I've just never had a best friend before… it took me a while to even get to the point where I could stomach Rachel." Brittany laughed,

"Well you have one now." She reaches over and squeezes my hands tightly. I have no idea if she felt it or not, but there was a spark.

A good spark.

I lost breath and glanced down at our joined hands and blinked.

They fit so perfectly together.

Brittany must have felt it to because she pulled away slowly, our eyes locked now and our breathing hitched. "Um," Brittany breathed, "Let's play 20 questions."

"Ok…"

"Cats or dogs?"

"Britt, I don't think that's how you play…"

"This is my version." I couldn't stop myself from smiling around this girl.

"Fine… cats."

"Ew, why?"

"Dogs are too loud, and they shit everywhere. And they slob…" I took a sip of my drink. "You like dogs?" Brittany nodded.

"They're adorable, and sweet. And they protect you…"

So she wants to be protected… protected from what?

She bit her cinnamon roll and interrupted my thought. "Your turn."

"So we each get 10 questions?"

"Is that one of your 10?" Brittany asked confused.

"Wha-no." I giggled.

"Oh, ok. Yeah, we both get 10 questions."

"Ok… this is very important to our friendship Brittany, Chocolate or Vanilla?"

"Vanilla, always." I beam and clap my hands together.

"So do you want to share a vanilla Sunday one day?"

"As long as it has bananas in it," I nod my head,

"Definitely,"

"You know you have seven questions left, right?" She said in a teasing tone, I poked my lip out into a pout.

"Britt-Britt… that doesn't count."

"Hmmm… ok." My pout turns into a smile, "Bath and body works or Victoria's secret?"

"Vicky's secret." I say quickly.

"Why?"

"They're sexier, I'm sexy. We're practically cousins." I smile at her as she laughs.

I never get tired of hearing that.

We continued with the game, learning more about each other. Turns out Brittany was incredibly terrified of storms. Once when she was 6 there was a storm and the next morning there was a huge tree right outside of her house. She said that at that moment she realized someone could have been under the tree or the lighting could have struck someone walking in the rain; and ever since then when there was a storm she feared for her life and others that she loved. Turns out she prefers bath and body works over Victoria's secret, she doesn't find herself sexy.

Which is clearly a lie.

* * *

New York was actually a really ugly place. Sure, it's pretty at night if you're staying at some 5 star hotel with a presidential suite, but in the daylight: the streets were dirty, and buildings seemed as if they were going to topple over and crush you. The people were rude; you couldn't get from one ave to the other without being bumped or knocked down. Those who drove in New York were crazy, almost as crazy as the people who would walk in the middle of traffic. And everything was crowded. Brittany and I had made it a part of our day to meet at the corner where our streets met, and we'd walk to the train station together. "What are your dreams?" I'd missed her voice so much, she never called me and I never called her. We texted like we were each others life lines; but no phone calls. The one time I did call her a few days ago; she rushed me off the phone. She said she was busy and as she hung up I could hear someone yelling in the background.

"Um," I'd never really planned out my dreams… "I want to be like the lesbian Marilyn Monroe." I joked.

"You'd make a hot Marilyn Monroe." Brittany said in a serious tone. I blushed before continuing.

"Seriously though, I just want to sing. I want to have the screaming fans and sold out shows… I want to write songs and express myself because that's the only way I really know how to." Brittany hooked her arms around me as we made our way to the train station. "I want to have my albums go platinum and I want my singles to be in the top 10." Brittany grinned and her grip got tighter on my arm. "What are your dreams?"

"To get away," She said in a low voice.

"To get away?" we stopped in our tracks and I leaned against the cold tiles on the station. Brittany was fidgeting, playing with her fingers and looking down at her feet.

"I just want to get away… sometimes everything is just too much. I'm so overwhelmed."

"Brittany," I said in a soft voice. "What do you want to get away from?" She shook her head, but I could tell there was something on her mind.

"Nothing… everyone wants to get away, right?" I gave her a weak smile as the train to take us to school pulled up.

"Um, yeah… I guess." We took our seats in the back. "I came here to get away." Brittany turned to me and smiled.

"Away from what?"

"Let's just say I wasn't the most lady like girl in high school… there were a lot of rumors, and when I finally came out guys just started talking to me, telling me that they could straighten me out," I chuckled, "It was funny because that's what I'd been trying to do since I was 14 years old was "straighten" myself out…"

"The heart wants what the heart wants." Brittany said with a smile.

"Exactly…"

"Why couldn't you just accept yourself… there's nothing wrong with it…"

"I know that now, but sitting around in the locker room and hearing all the girls talk about how much they loved their boyfriends and how much they liked when they would touch them… I just never had those feelings. So I started sleeping around, trying to feel something with someone… trying to like it. But as soon as it was over I couldn't get out of their beds fast enough or get them out of my bed fast enough…" Brittany shook her head. "When I'm with guys it just doesn't feel right."

"I'm happy you've stopped torturing yourself." I smiled too and she grabbed my hand. "What else did you want to get away from?"

"Cheerleading. I hated cheerleading… singing is my passion, but in high school I wanted to be popular, and being popular was being a Cheerio. If I would have stayed in Lima I'd probably be a co-cheer coach with Sue Sylvester and I'd end up shooting her or myself. And I'd shoot her first." Brittany giggled and pulled me into a hug.

"I'm proud of you," My blush grew and I bowed my head.

"So what about you? What are you getting away from?"

"Nothing." She said quickly. I blinked at her for a minute, waiting for a better response.

"Everyone calls me stupid…" She whispered. "And they're right, I am. I can't even catch a train by myself, or get around the city. My mom always says that it's good that I'm pretty because without my looks no one would want me." She gives me a weak smile, " Jared thinks I'm stupid… but he still wants me…" she pauses for a minute while my blood boils. Jared is obviously an asshole.

"You're not stupid Brittany! You're not… I got confused my first week here-"

"But I've been here a whole year…"

"Not everyone catches on as quick but you're not stupid Brittany… you know what train to catch now, right? No one took the time to teach you how to ride the trains here, but just because no one taught you doesn't mean you're stupid."

"It's not even that, I sucked in high school I had a 0.0 GPA, I was held back which is why I'm a freshman… I am stupid. He tells me all the time."

Fucking Jared.

"Britt, I'm a freshmen too… I dropped out of a college in Kentucky because I needed to find myself and figure things out, maybe you needed to figure things out." Brittany refused to look at me. "Britt." I softly touched her cheek and forced her to face me. "What GPA did you graduate with?" Brittany wiped a tear away quickly as her cheeks began t turn red.

"A 2.8…"

"See? You got your GPA that high in one year? Most people can't even raise theirs from a 2.3 to a 2.4 in a year…" I bit my lip slowly, dragging against my teeth and smiling at her. "You're a genius, Britt. And don't listen to anyone who tells you different." She nods her head as she slumps into me. She felt so comfortable and we sort of just melted into each other. "How is dance going to help you get away?" I wiped her eyes dry with my thumb, shocking myself. I was never so gentle and calm with someone, so caring.

"I want to choreograph music videos… and maybe have my own studio or school of dance…"

"That sounds amazing." Brittany let out a tiny sigh, her eyes starting to well again as she whispered,

"He told me I couldn't do that either." I wasn't the straightest knife in the drawer, and I'd never actually been in a relationship with a guy where we did shit like care and love each other… but I was 99.9% sure this wasn't how a relationship was suppose to go. One person always putting the other down? Who wants to be with someone like that?

"You can do anything you put your mind to, and you don't need him to reassure you." I could tell Brittany still doubted herself, she was telling herself that I was lying. "Speaking of dancing, it takes some serious brain power to remember all those damn steps." Brittany's eyes find mines and I'm sure her smile just lit up the whole damn train, and everyone is going blind as we speak. She reached her hand over and took my pinky in hers.

* * *

Saturday came around and I had told Brittany that I would teach her to catch the trains. They weren't as confusing once you got used to the trains and all the stops. I brushed my hair a few times, putting up in a high bun with a few strands hanging in my face. I pulled up my extremely ripped jeans. I scanned my bra drawer and decided on a solid black bra and then I pulled my grey cropped top over my head. When I walked out of my room I headed straight to the kitchen for breakfast. "Santana! Come sing with us!" Kurt hollered. Of course he and Rachel were singing along to Moulin Rouge.

"Oh my god! I need a sanctuary, seriously guys; can't you watch a normal movie? Bridesmaids, me, myself and Ural, anything else but Broadway musicals?"

"You know you love it!" Kurt said shimming over to me.

"Do not come near me." I told him, sticking my hand out to distance us.

"Where are heading?" Rachel asked pulling me into a hug and obviously feeling very friendly. I stiffened and tried to move away but I was caught in her grasp.

"I'm teaching Brittany to ride the train today." They both beamed and I could see it coming already.

"The hot blonde you met like two weeks ago?" Kurt questioned. I just nodded my head grabbing an apple and biting into it hard.

"You two have become very close, very fast." I shrugged my shoulders like it was no big deal.

"We get a long." I told them, but that didn't wipe the nauseating smiles off their faces. "Stop looking at me like that."

"You like her!" Rachel beamed, pointing to me.

"It doesn't really matter because she's straight."

"No one is straight now-a-days. There are always exceptions."

"She has an asshole boyfriend, I'm sure there aren't many exceptions."

"Don't knock it till you try it," and with that they shimmed back to the living room and continued to sing.

Much louder.

I texted Brittany saying that I couldn't stand to be in the house with Rachel and Kurt much longer and that we could just get started a little early.

But she didn't text me back.

When I got to her apartment and rang her buzzer no one answered. So I waited for a kindly perverted old man to let me in, and since he was giving me weird looks, I took the stairs all the way to the 6th floor where Brittany told me she lived. I made my way down the hallway and before I could knock, I heard Brittany crying. "I-I'm just going out with a friend," I heard her say.

"What friend? You don't have any friends." He says sternly.

"I jus-st made one… she's teaching me how to catch the train." I hear him chuckle.

"You're too stupid to catch the train." He booms. How could someone be so mean to Brittany? I start to knock.

"Britany? Brittany!?" I knock louder and the screaming stops when he answers the door. I soon find a white male in front of me; he was smaller than he sounded behind the door though. He's only about 2 inches taller than me; I couldn't help but think that Puck, Mike, Sam, and especially Lauren could all take him. He has eyes like Brittany, but spiked dark brown hair and he looks like he's extra grown, like working man grown. And he must be because he's wearing a suite. Brittany just graduated, how did she have time to find a boyfriend that works at a place where you need a suite?

"Who the hell are you?" He asks.

"I'm Santana, and you must be the lovely Jared." I say, sarcasm dripping in my tone. He opens the door, smirking at me and I see Brittany wiping her tears away as she looks up at me.

"I just have to get my shoes…" She says scrambling to the floor to find them. I had to admit, the apartment was nice. The carpet was white and the furniture was red and black. They had a flat screen and the kitchen was pretty big too. Jared stepped away from me and grabs Brittany's arm, pulling her up to him and into a very sloppy disgusting looking kiss.

His lips pretty much just swallowed Brittany's whole face.

"Ew…" I can't help but say out loud and he pulls away as Brittany starts to laugh. "Are you ready?" I ask her. She shakes her head but his grip only gets tighter on her arm.

"Be back here by 8, do you understand?" Brittany quickly nods, looking at her arm as he squeezes.

"Yes Jared!" She practically screams. When he finally lets go Brittany shuffles over to me, gets her bag and grabs my hand and leads me out of the house.

"Brittany,"

"He just worries…" She cuts me off. I rolled my eyes.

He was the reason she always put herself down.

He's the reason…

* * *

**A/N: So I changed it so that they are now 19, Santana, Rachel, and Kurt graduated last year while Brittany is a recent graduate. Kurt and Rachel are sophomores and Santana is a freshmen because she came to new York too late to apply to NYADA so she just got a job at the bar where she ended up being a cage dancer. Therefore the year is 2013, mid-august and Brittany and Santana are just now meeting. For the most part I want to stick to the glee storyline up until everyone graduated but something's and names will probably be changed. A long with a few story lines.**

**A/N: As I get deeper into the story the chapters will probably get longer so... just to fill you in. It'll also be maybe up to a week, week and a half on the updates.**

**A quick look at Jared and his personality ; D**

**Excuse any mistakes.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except my own ideas.**

**Review review review! Tell me what you think.**

**-Do you like how Brittany and Santana's relationship is growing?**

**what do you want to see... er read happen? Let me know!**


	3. It's nothing I'm nothing

**A/N: Italics for this chapter are singing and a dream. Thanks so much for all the follows and reviews!**

***Warning: this chapter contains physical, sexual and mental abuse; not graphic totally but it's in here… not a lot either**

**This is another short update, I thought they'd get longer and they probably will, but for right now I like the suspense of keeping them short. And it drains less out of me. **

* * *

Brittany's POV:

My head was forced back by the blow; I could feel the blood running down my cheek, dripping to the carpet and sinking in. I brought my hand to my face, keeping it directed toward the wall behind the wall. My gaze was held on the ground; I didn't want to look at him. But then I felt his hand grab me by my hair and tug hard; our faces were now inches apart. His breathing was hard and so was mines, he had anger in his eyes while mines expressed fear.

He'd never gotten this angry before.

Before I could really do anything I was pushed down to the ground and I could feel his foot pressing hard on my stomach. "Stop!" I tried to shout but it was just below a whisper because I was running out of breath; the air was getting so thick in this room.

"You're fucking stupid, you know that?" He screamed.

"Help," My voice wasn't working; it was like my voice was trapped beneath his foot. Hot tears ran down my face as he screams once more repeating the question. "Y-Yes…" I breathe. "Jared, please stop…" I choke out with a cough, after he practically stomps my stomach into the ground he removes his foot, but not before kicking me in the side. "Ah!" I scream and hold my stomach.

"Yes what!?"

"I-I…" It was hard to breath, I couldn't exactly form a sentence. "I'm stupid!" I cried.

Everything hurts as of right now.

He pulls me up and pushes me back and I hit the wall hard, crumbling to the ground. "I'm sorry!" I sob. Jared shows no sign of accepting my apology; he told me to be back by 6.

The train was running late.

I start to cry harder, pleading and begging. Telling him that I really tried to be back by 6, but it was the damn train! I'd waited for it for over an hour, I even called him a few times and left him some text messages; he didn't answer.

Throughout the last year I'd honestly lost track of how many times Jared had hit me or called me names. How many times he'd push me and insult me.

"Shut up! Dumb bitch, just shut up!" He screams punching me in the mouth. My stream of tears turns into a waterfall and I just let myself give in completely. I let my body slump down, my tears fall free and I bow my head. My mouth feels like it's going to fall off, I can taste the blood now.

And I wait.

I wait for him to do something else, hit me somewhere he hasn't in the last hour.

But he doesn't.

He's bending down to me now, picking me up gently and taking me to the bed. I'm still crying but the tears have slowed, and my breathing has evened out now. He's laying me on the bed and kissing me softly on my forehead. I cringe at him being close to me; I don't want him!

I never have.

He has the first aid kit on the bed side and he's dabbing the blood on my face. Gently wiping it from my skin and kissing my uninjured cheek. "If anyone asks, you were reading a text and ran into door," He tells me sternly. I glance up and nod my head yes, and I quietly hope he rolls to other side of the bed and goes to sleep. But he doesn't. Once he cleans all the blood from my body he begins to kiss my neck, he's being rough and he's not minding my bruises that are beginning to form. I flinch when he grabs my waist in the same spot he had just kicked a while ago.

"Jared…"I start to push him away. I don't want to.

I honestly just want to run to Santana's place and cry in her arms.

She'd make me smile. She'd make me laugh.

I feel his hands quickly grasp my wrist and he pins me to the bed. Jared kisses his way up my neck, to my ear and I can feel his breath on me.

I hate it.

"You're nothing, do you understand?" He says in a low voice, "You're a stupid, worthless, pathetic piece of shit." His grip gets tighter and he forces my wrist deeper into the mattress. "Who else do you think is going to want a pathetic little slut like you, huh?" Things turn worse much faster and he's literally ripping my clothes off of me. Jared throws my torn shirt to the ground and yanks my shorts down along with my panties, I yelp in protest.

"I-I-I"

"Nobody! Nobody is going to want you! You're not even pretty, you're less than average. You'd be alone without me." He growls.

"No-"I start, but the tears start before I could get more out.

"Yes!" His pants are down now, and so are his boxers as they're being kicked to the foot of the bed and he forces my legs open. "See how much of a slut you are?" He smiles. His grip loosens when he feels that I'm not fighting back anymore but he just continues to talk. "You're nothing without me! No one else is ever going to want you; you're a stupid little girl who'll never amount to anything. Ever!" I sob, feeling his penis start to rub against me. I shake my head. I don't want to!

"No! No!" I cry but he just smiles at me and thrust himself inside of me without warning. I gasp and hold my breath.

"Take it you slut! No one else is ever going to want you, especially not like this, look at how wet you are."

I don't want this, but I don't want to be alone and I know he's right. No one's ever wanted me before…

He thrust harder, slamming himself into me and making me whimper beneath him I close my eyes and pretend I'm somewhere else. Anywhere else.

Maybe with Santana in a beach house where she'd make love to me gently. Slowly.

But when I hear him groan and grunt, pushing harder into me I know it's over. He pushes me away and get onto his side of the bed and falls asleep.

_Santana takes my hand in hers and she rubs my knuckles. We're sitting in an empty field, somewhere far away and it's only us. But that's ok, I like it this way. She crawls onto my lap, placing her legs on either side of me, careful not to break out eye contact or remove her hands. She places a soft kiss on my lips, kissing the bruise Jared left behind. "You're beautiful-"_

_"No-"_

_"Beautiful." She repeats, kissing the bruise once more. She guides her hands down and began to massage my sides with care, sure not to apply too much pressure. "I'd never hurt you." She whispered against my lips, her kisses go from soft to needy; she needs me._

_Someone needs me!_

_I wrap my arms around her waist, I wince when I bring her closer, her stomach rubbing into mines and irritating the bruise there. And when she pulls away, looking at me as if she's caused me pain, I smile. _

_"You're worth it,"_

I wake up with a smile, my eyes fluttering open. But all my bruises have formed and I can feel pain jolting through my body, I just lay there looking up at the ceiling. I can barely get up to go and take a shower, dancing is definitely out of the question today. I try to get up but everything aches and my head is spinning from when he punched me yesterday. Then I notice that Jared is not in bed with me but standing at the door. Propping himself up on the doorframe with his arms folded. "C'mon." He tells me, but I just look down at my hands. It's so hard to move.

He takes in a sharp breath and exhales as he walks over to me and picks me up off the bed and carries me to the bathroom. There he has set up a bubble bath and it smells like cherries or something, the lights are off and he has a few candles lit. I'm already naked so he placed me in the tub, and my body instantly relaxes. But I just tense up again when I feel his touch, the feel of his hands rubbing a soapy rag over my back and around to shoulders, passed my breast and to my stomach.

His touch makes me want to kill myself.

_He_ makes me want to kill myself.

"Brittany, you have to stop making me so damn mad." He finally breaks the silence. I look at him blankly; he always does this after we get into a fight. He'll do something sweet like buy me flowers or cook me dinner, or run a bath to relax me and help my bruised body. But he never apologizes. "God, if you could just listen to me sometimes we wouldn't have this problem. Do you think I like hurting you?" He asks, squeezing some of the water from the rag onto my shoulder, I watch as it runs down my arms and lands back into the perfectly white tub. "Do you?!" He practically yells,

"No." I say instantly, not wanting him to get angry again. He lets out a sigh of relief.

"If you don't get yourself together; I will leave you. Then you'll be out on the streets of New York." He gets up from his kneeling position and he dries his hands on a towel. He has class. "I'm sure one of the many street walkers would love to have their way with you." He says before he leaves me in the tub.

* * *

The week went by painfully slow; I didn't leave the house because I didn't want anyone to see my face. Especially not Santana. There was a small gash on my lips from where Jared had slapped me, and my eyes were redish purple all around. Not to mention my sides still hurt, along with my stomach. Things were as good as they could get between Jared and me; he'd get mad if I didn't have dinner ready, or if the dishes were dirty when he got home, he was mad that my eyes was bruised, he said I didn't look as pretty with my eye like that. After a week I needed to go to class, so I pushed through it. I got up in the morning and threw on a pair of baggy sweat pants and a fitted hoodie. I put my hair into a messy ponytail, letting it fall over my shoulders and I slipped on a pair of my tennis shoes. Santana had been texting me, asking where I was, but I was too ashamed to answer her messages, and when she called me I was afraid she would hear the fear and sadness in my voice; so I let them go to voicemail. She sounded worried about me, and she told me she missed me. That just made me laugh.

No one misses me. My parents barely call me and all of my friends from high school stopped talking to me after graduation. I only had Jared.

It felt nice to be outside though, the cool September breeze hit my face and I inhaled it deeply. It felt so good, _so_ good. As I started walking down the street I panicked; my eye! Someone was going to see it and then Jared would get mad again.

And then…

I didn't want to think about that!

Before I could run back into the house I felt a soft tap on my shoulder, I jumped in my skin and turned quickly. My eyes met big brown ones and I calmed down, I brought my hand up to my eye quickly, trying to cover it. "Hey," She said softly as she giggled, "What are you doing?"

"I-I-"She wasn't freaking out about my eye, "Don't you see it?" I asked.

"I see beautiful blue eyes on a gorgeous girl but… that's it." Santana knew exactly how to make me blush, and feel good. I took my phone out and held it to my face; I did put my counselor on before I left the house. I began to laugh at myself, "You're silly." Santana said. "I missed you." She said again, making my heart jump. "I was coming by to see if you were going to actually go to class today." I smiled at her as we began to walk to the subway.

Over the last month, since the first day we met; Santana had clouded my every thought, my senses. For god's sake, I was having dreams about her! This was a weird feeling, having feelings for another girl. But I did. Santana made me feel… different. A good different. But different. Whenever she was around my throat grew dry, and when she smiled I felt like I was going to melt, and when she looked at me… god, with those eyes. Those big, brown dough eyes. I could look into them forever. I felt like my heart was beating outside of my chest and she could totally see it. I loved how she would move her hips when she sang and how she licked her lips when she didn't have lip gloss. And I loved the single dimple in her cheek that showed up when she made even the slightest facial expression. I sighed to myself. Santana was pretty perfect. She would never want someone like me.

Someone who's nothing. Someone who's tainted. Someone who's average.

"I missed you too. I'm sorry I bowed my head, I didn't like lying to Santana, but I didn't feel well.

"I would have come over to take care of you but… I figured Jared had that role covered." I shook my head,

"He had class."

"Class?"

"He's in school studying for the bar."

"To be like a lawyer?" I nodded my head once more; I really didn't want to talk about him. She must have sensed it because she dropped the subject but nodded her head as well, simply saying,

"Well the next time you don't feel good, I'll come over with chicken noodle soup and Nyquil. And my sexy strip nurse uniform." She winks at me and takes my hand when we get to the cross walk.

"With The little mermaid?" I asks hopefully. She giggles and nods her head,

"I'll definitely bring the little mermaid."

Fuck, my heart just stopped.

She turns back to me, the traffic in New York is always bad, but for some reason today it seems much more hectic. "Stay close, ok?" I nod my head slowly, staring at Santana as she guides me through the traffic holding onto my hand tightly. My eyes slowly travel down, Santana had like the perfect body and her skin tight black and white stripped dress only showed off her curves. And the black heels she has on to match on draw stares from the cars and people passing by. I'm surprised she doesn't stop traffic as she struts trough the streets with me following close behind. Once we're across the street she's still holding on tight, but it's probably so we don't get separated. There are a lot of people walking around.

We made our way to the back of the train and I sat down by the window while she took the aisle seat. She softly began to sing as the train moved on to the next stop. She always sung while we were on the train, or walking down the street, or sitting in the café. She said that it was a way for her to sing without Cassandra jumping down her throat. I usually liked to think that she was singing to me, but I knew that was silly, crazy even. Santana probably had a beyond gorgeous girlfriend, because I perfect woman like Santana needed a woman that was perfect like her.

_"There is something that I see, in the way you look at me. There's a smile, there's a truth in your eyes. What an unexpected way, on this unexpected day. Could it be this is where I… belong?" _She stopped singing to look at me with that dimple in her cheek,_ "It is you I have loved all along." _I smile too, recognizing the song from the little mermaid soundtrack right away; I joined in.

_"There's no more mystery, it is finally clear to me. You're the home my heart searched for so long. And it is you I have loved, all along."_ She stopped, tucking some hair behind her ear and hiding her face a little as let me sing by myself,

_"There were times I ran to hide, afraid to show the other side. Alone in the night without you, but now I know just who you are, and I know you hold my heart, finally, this is where I belong. And it is you I have loved all along."_ I couldn't stop my grin from growing wider; she was smiling at me too as she joined in again.

_"There's no more mystery, it is finally clear to me. You're the home my heart searched for so long. And it is you I have loved, all along."_ Santana put her hands over her heart, now looking at me directly in the eyes, her eyes glossy now.

_"Over and over I'm filled with emotion. You're all that's rushing through my veins, and I am filled with the sweetest devotions, as I, I look into your perfect face." _Her voice trails off and we're just staring at each other now, suddenly a roar of applaud takes over and we turn to see everyone in our cart cheering and clapping. And I have no idea which one of us was blushing harder. All I know is that I only smile like this when I'm with _her_.

"You can seriously sing, Britt." Santana compliments me as we go up the stairs and into the streets of New York. I shake my head,

"You're the one that can sing. You can tell Cassandra to suck it the next time she has something to say. You're voice is amazing." Santana blushes for the 4th time in the last two hours and we make our way down the street to NYADA.

"Little Mermaid has always been like my favorite movie, Arielle was hot…" She laughs. "I only watched the movie because of her bikini bra…"

"Did you get mad that she married Prince Eric?" Santana shakes her head.

"They helped me believe in love; no matter the obstacles, you'll end up with who you're supposed to."

* * *

I'm too sore to dance, but unless I have a doctor's note or show her the bruises; which I'm not going to do, my dance professor doesn't care. So I change into a t-shirt and struggle through the routine, stumbling a few times and earning glances from the other kids in my class. I can feel my bruises start to throb every time I hit the floor, or jump in the air, or spin around; my body is telling me to stop. But I can't. I want to pretend like last week never happened, like what he said didn't matter.

But it did, it all did.

I'm limping from class, walking slowly down the hall and I sit down on a nearby bench to catch my breath; to give my sides and legs a break. And once again, I'm pleased by Santana's grinning face approaching me. "How was your first day back?" She asks sitting down beside me.

"Something like hell," she giggles at my words and blush when I feel her gaze on me.

"So… we're friends? Like best friends." I nod my head slowly, wondering where she's going with this. "Well, a few of my friend from Lima are coming up here this weekend; Puck and Sam. They're visiting me and Olsen twins… and I want you to meet them." I light up at the invitation, wincing when I move too fast from excitement.

"I'd love too! I get to meet Kurt and Rachel too?" Santana nods her head,

"They're really annoying so I'll apologize for that now…"

"I bet they're the best! You're just being modest." Her face goes serious and she shakes her head. Santana looks me over, giving me a weak smile.

"You're tired," She says.

"How did you know?" She shrugs her shoulders.

"Best friends intuition?" She says lightly, "Maybe you should go back home. Are you ok?" I nod my head again, I hate lying to her!

I'm not ok. And she can tell. I know she knows by the way she's still looking at me. "Are you sure?" I began to nod franticly, she can't find out. She'll laugh at me, or tell me that Jared was right. I don't want Santana to think that way of me. Her eyes widen and she grabs my wrist gently, "Britt, what happened?" She asks. I'd forgot about those; from when he pinned me to the bed. "Britt…"

"It's nothing." Was the first thing that came to my mind but she wasn't buying it. "Please-"

"Brittany-"

"Please! It's nothing…" I whisper again. She nods her head, seeing that I don't want to talk about it. I expect her to remove her hands and leave m to be; but instead I feel soft, ginger thumbs rubbing at both my wrist, her touch burning into my skin. I snap my eyes up at her and she slowly brings hers to meet them.

"They look like they hurt…" She whispers. Her eyes are telling me she wants to help, they've gone from angry when she first noticed the bruises to kind and hurt at the same time. "Do they?" She asks me slowly. I nod my head, a single tear escaping my eyes. She brings my wrist up and kisses them softly, letting her lips rest in place for a while.

I could swear that everything just stopped. The people hurrying to their classes, the noises of the hall, the conversations, everything. It's just me and Santana, kind of like my dream from the other night. Suddenly she lets go of one of my wrist, letting it sit in her lap and she reaches up to touch the scar on my lip, her touch is so light I barely feel it.

There's warmth between us. A feeling that's so brand new to me that air becomes trapped in my throat and I can feel my lungs about to collapse. She gets up and pulls me up with her as we leave of the building and head down the street to the subway.

She didn't let go of my hand the whole way to her place. Not when we got on the Subway, not when she paid both our ways, not when we were walking; she never broke the contact. And she would turn to me every so often, gazing into my eyes and giving me a weak smile.

Santana lived in a small warehouse like place, it was spacious and big, and they didn't have doors but they had curtains. She led me to her room and we sat down the on the bed. For the first few minutes we both sat Indian style, staring at our fingers that were laced together. It scared me, being so close to someone. Being so close to Santana. But it gave me comfort in a way I wasn't ever sure was possible. She finally spoke, her voice stern yet soft,

"Brittany. Tell me what's going on."

* * *

**What'd you guys think? I know, I know; no one likes Jared; lol we're not supposed to! Sorry for any typos I had...**

**Review, review, review!**


	4. Stay the night

**To the guest reviews:**

**I'm not sure how long this will be, but Brittany's abuse definitely will be stopping within the next three chapters or less. **

**Thankyou for all the other reviews, I'm so happy you guys are wrapped in the story! That means I'm doing good!**

**Also, towards the end the point of view changes to third person…**

**Without any further wait…**

**Chapter 4!**

**/**

Brittany just begins to shake her head and I'm stuck on what to do; these are some pretty harsh bruises on her wrist and I start to wonder if there are more that I can't see. Her head is bowed; her eyes are focused on her lap and refuses to look at me. Her blonde hair is covering her face and her whole body is tense. I get up and go get a long clean towel from the hall closet and run it under some water in the kitchen. I want her to tell me everything, I was het to tell me what's wrong and who the hell did that to her; sure, I could take a guess but I don't know for sure if _he_ did it. But if he did… if he did hurt her like that… I'll kill him.

I return to my bed room to find Brittany in that same position with her head down, her lip is poked out and she looks like she's in deep thought. Once I'm close enough in front of her I drop to my knees and gently take her wrist in my hands. While in the bathroom I made her a warm compress, my abuela showed me how to make them when I was younger. Since I was a tomboy I used to fight with all the boys around the neighborhood, and sometimes I'd come back with a bruise or two, and they always helped to sooth the damaged skin. Her eyes move to me slightly and she watches as I place the warm compress over both her wrist. A tear runs down her cheek and her breathing hitches slightly. "Is it too hot?" I ask softly, she shakes her head. "Good, it'll help." I tell her, "It'll help it not hurt so much," I struggle with my next sentence, "Who hurt you Brittany?" She's crying silently now, shaking her head as if she's denying something.

"Jared," she finally chokes out, I feel my skin grow hot and my veins are pumping.

"He did this to you?" I ask for clarification; I'd hate to kill someone who actually didn't do anything.

"He just gets so mad sometimes… it's my fault though."

"Brittany no!" I stand up and cross my arms over her chest, "It isn't your fault he can't control his temper."

"But it is!" She screams back and matches me by standing as well. "I'm stupid and worthless and I'm a burden on him; I deserve it! It's exactly what I deserve. I deserve to be treated like this… he's the only person that would put up with me." Her tears are falling faster and her cheeks are red while the rest of be body is so pale. My eyes are watering now and I'm shaking my head.

"No, no, he put all of that into your head-"

"Because it's true! It's all true! No one else wants me; no one would ever want me! Everyone knows I'm dumb!" she's shaking, wrapping her arms around herself and fidgeting. "And he's the only person that will ever love me, he's the only one who-"

"That's not true Brittany! It's not. Plenty of guys would love to love you in all the right ways. He doesn't love you!"

"How would you know!? He does love me, he takes care of me-"

"At a price! He takes care of you at a price! You're probably going to be his trophy wife that he beats every time she fucks up, and he's only going to keep hurting you!" It's quiet and tension quickly fills the air.

"It's not as bad as it looks," She tells me. I want to scream to her, _I love you!_ But it's a little extreme considering we've only known each other for a few months, and in these few months I've felt like I've never known someone as well as I know Brittany, but I obviously didn't know this side of her.

"You're amazing," I whisper to her, "And you do deserve better-"

"Shut up!" She screams, "Stop lying to me! Just stop it!" She pushes pass me but the push hurts her more because she's now falling to ground gripping her side.

"Brittany-"

"Leave me alone, it's nothing." I grow softer with her, pulling her up to me so she's looking into my eyes. Everything suddenly just seemed so damn right. I know she's not into girls but I just want to kiss her fears away. Tell her that I'm here and that I'd treat her like a queen if she just gave me the chance. But this isn't the time for that. I take my hand and slowly grab onto Brittany's shirt and I began to lift it, she stiffens and tries to push me away but I refuse to budge.

"It's ok, let me see." I tell her pushing her shirt higher up her skin. I finally stop at her breast and let it rest there and I gasp when I see a much large purple and red bruise spreading across her side, and another oval shaped bruise on her stomach. "Brittany,"

"He just gets mad he just gets mad," She chants in a low voice,

"_I_ get mad! But what he does to you, it's abuse, Brittany! He's abusing you!" I thought if I said the word then it would convince me to leave me.

"No it's not. He loves me."

"Is this the kind of love you want?" My mind is boggled right now and I can't believe she said that. "You want love that hits you, and leaves bruises and puts you down? Is that what you want?"

"No one-"

"I do! I want you!" I scream, her eyes widen and I can tell she's shocked, "I want you," I repeat, "I want to love you and I want you to know that you're worth so much then you give yourself credit for." She's shaking her head, she pulls her shirt back down and rushes to the front door, but I follow behind her. I'm mad now, is she really going back to him? "Why can't I love you?" I slam the door shut before she can get out of it and I stand by it to make sure she can't leave. "It's one of two things; or both. Either it's because I'm a girl or because you like the way he treats you."

"I don't…"

"You do! You must! You like being hit and you like being hurt, you like when he says mean things about you and calls you names,"

"No-"Her bottom lip is quivering,

"If I hit you would you love me?" I ask as my voice breaks, "If I slapped you across the face and made you bleed would you love me then, or if I kicked you… if I pushed you. Do you prefer that?!" She shakes her head as she begins to break down, I feel like every emotions she's ever felt is spilling out before my eyes and I can only hope that Rachel and Kurt aren't on their way home.

Their dramatic asses would only make things worse.

"Please don't." She tells me in a fragile voice, "Please don't hurt me like he does… I couldn't take that." I step closer to Brittany, instantly regretting my words. I was just so mad! "Please, no!" she screams but I don't back down and I take a seat next to her crumbling body on the floor. "Santana, please don't hit me." She finally whispers. I pull her close to me and rock her in my arms.

"I won't… I never will."

Her breathing is so heavy when we get back to my room. The fight took a lot of her because now she's sleeping my arms, and I should enjoy this.

I do.

But I didn't want to be holding her like this, _because_ of what he did. I take my fingers and brush a few strands behind her ear so I'm able to see her face. Her eyes are red and so is the tip of her nose, she has tear marks where her tears had dried and her eyes are puffy. But she's still so beautiful. I run my fingers through her hair, as sleepy as I am I can't help but just want to stare at her and make sure she's okay when she wakes up… I do the only thing I can think of right now to sooth her as she starts to stir in her sleep.

_"No Mountains too high, for you to climb_

_ All you have to do is have some climbing faith, oh yeah_

_ No rivers too wide, for you to make it across_

_ All you have to do is believe it when you pray"_

"Jared… no! No…" She mumbles, I hold her tightly and place a soft kiss on her cheek as another tear drops from her eyes, I start to sing a little louder, but still as softly as I can.

_"And then you will see, the morning will come_

_ And everyday will be bright as the sun_

_ All of your fears cast them on me_

_ I just want you to see..."_

Brittany snuggles closer to me and her hand that was on my back is now gripping my shirt as she starts to cry in her sleep. "Please," She mumbles, I lean down closer to her ear and shush her as I continue to sing.

_"I'll be your cloud up in the sky_

_ I'll be your shoulder when you cry_

_ I'll hear your voices when you call me_

_No matter how far you are, I'm near_

_ It makes no difference who you are…"_

Her cries grow softer and her grip lightens, I feel her relaxing as we're tangled together under my sheets.

_I saw the teardrops, and I heard you cry_

_ All you need is time, seek me and you shall find_

_ You have everything and you're still lonely_

_ It doesn't have to be this way, let me show you a better day_

_"And then you will see, the morning will come_

_ And all of your days will be bright as the sun_

_ So all of your fears, just cast them on me_

_ How can I make you see..._

_And when it's time to face the storm_

_ I'll be right by your side_

_ Grace will keep us safe and warm_

_ And I know we will survive_

_ And when it seems as if your end is drawing near_

_ Don't you dare give up the fight_

_ Just put your trust beyond the sky..."_

"I won't let him hurt you again Britt," I whisper holding her in my arms and falling a sleep as well.

/

"Aw! Look at the love birds!" I hear Kurt purr to Rachel who is soon by his side. They both have these dreamy looks on their faces and I throw them a glare; they're going to wake Brittany. I slowly, gently, untangle myself from her and climb out of bed, closing my sheet that supposed to be a door so Brittany can have some privacy.

"Could you two be any louder?" I whispered through gritted teeth. Kurt looked passed me and tried to peak through the curtin,

"I know you didn't sleep with her?! It's only," He checked his watch, "1 pm."

"San-Tana!" Rachel hummed nudging me.

"No, no, stop it guys! I didn't sleep with Brittany, I was comforting her-"

"By sleeping with her?"

"No," I rolled my eyes, "She's having a hard time." I tell them and they both arch eyebrows. "You both have to promise not to get all broadway dramatic on me, okay?" They nod simotaniously, "Brittany's boyfriend hits her." And they gasp, Rachel's eyes well instantly,

"She looks so small!" Kurt exclaimed

"When she wakes up you have to promise to pretend like you know nothing, understood?" they nod slowly, peeking in to look at Brittany. "She can stay here for a few days, right?"

"Of course, I just don't want to hear you two like I heard you and Dani-"

"Can you stop mentioning her? God!" Rachel threw her hands up in defense,

"Sometimes I think you still like her-"

"I don't Rachel, okay?!" I shouted,

"And besides, Brittany's doesn't like me like that. I told her I wanted her and she just… she didn't really answer me…I just want her to be safe." The two nodded. "When's Puck and Sam getting into town?"

"In about a week." Santana nodded her head,

"I have no idea what I'm going to do, guys. Brittany wants to go back to her boyfriend but I can't stand to see her like that… you weren't hear you didn't-"

"We get it; its hard. She can stay here for as long as she needs." Kurt reassures, Rachel claps her hands.

"We'll be so awesome that she won't want to leave. Does she like showtunes?"

"She's a dancer… she might want to dance while we all sing." Maybe that's a good idea…something to maybe get Brittany's mind off of Jared.

/

Around 8 pm Brittany wakes up, at first she panics and looks all around her; where is she? Her breathing picks up and soon she starts to feel dizzy. "Britt?" A soft voice emerges from behind the curtain and Santana appears.

Now she remembers.

She's safe with Santana; her new friend who would never hurt her. Santana is giving Brittany a small smile and she's now handing Brittany a cup with whip cream on top. "I know how much you like hot chocolate so I stopped at the store on my way from wok and bought you some." "No, it's nice. Thank you." Brittany smiles back and takes a few sips as Santana watches her carefully. "I don't want to go back to him-"

"Then don't!" Santana shouts with enthusiasm, fear and angry dripping from her words, "Stay here. You don't have to pay rent, me and Kurt and Rachel can handle that on our own. You can sleep in my bed and I'll take the couch-"

"I'll take the couch; I don't want to kick you out or anything." Santana nods, realizing that Brittany just agreed to stay.

"Ok… do you want to help me make dinner? It's my night and I was think spaghetti?"

"That's one of my specialties! How about I cook and you relax, you've been working and up on your feet; probably dancing and singing at the diner all day, I can make dinner." Santana blushes; Brittany wants to cook for her, she's worried that she's too tired…

But she's just being a good friend.

/

"Brittany," Santana starts, "This is hobbit and lady Hummel. Olsen twins, this is Brittany." Santana squeezes the blonde's hand, seeing how nervous she is,

"Aren't hobbits like a diminutive humanoid race?"

"Yup sure are."

"Santana!" Rachel argues, "I thought we were passed this," She says with a pout. Santana rolls her eyes as Kurt extends a hand out for Brittany.

"I'm Kurt."

"And I'm Rachel-"

"Oh! Santana talks about you two all the time; you're like her best friends."

"They are not-"

"I knew you loved me!" Rachel lunges at Santana and throws her arms around the other brunette.

"Rachel…" Santana says through gritted teach, "Knock it off." Rachel pulls away but she's still wearing that wide toothy grin.

"Britt's going to cook us dinner tonight." Santana says as she leads her to the kitchen, "Here's some pots, and a pan to cook the meat and… a strainer…" Santana looks at Brittany. "Are you sure you don't want me to help?" Brittany nods her head,

"Go get comfortable, watch a movie with your besties-"

"Stop calling them that-"Santana says lowly, "You're my best friend."

"So are Kurt and Rachel… you should be nicer to them." Brittany suggest. Santana cringes at the thought,

"That's how our relationship is, they know I love them." Brittany smiles and begins to push Santana out of the kitchen.

"Out you go, out, out, out."

/

After the most amazing spaghetti Santana had ever tasted, she and Brittany sat in the living room watching The Little Mermaid. Kurt and Rachel tried to stay but they picked up on the glares Santana was throwing at them and decided to retire to their rooms. At this moment, Brittany and Santana were sitting close together. Brittany had her legs crossed Indian style, her shorts bunching up around her waist and exposing her long, toned legs, she had her hands placed over her mouth, while Santana sat back on the couch with hooded eyes; she was getting sleepy. "So…" Brittany's voice trailed off. "Why are you single?" That got Santana's attention quickly and she looked up at Brittany.

"Um… I… what do you mean?"

"Well, you never talk about her so you must be single. But you're too many types of awesome to be single…" This makes Santana blush,

"I had a girlfriend, Danielle, like a year ago. But she dumped me…" Santana says in a low voice.

"She probably knew she wasn't good enough for you-" Santana had always been sensitive about this subject; Dani dumped her because she wasn't good enough for her.

"Britt, seriously? You can't say anything about anyone being with someone that they're too good for." Santana said

"I… You don't understand… I can't leave him."

"Why not?"

"Because I can't!" Brittany says as her eyes start to fill with tears once more.

"Why not, Brittany! Why the hell can't you leave this sick bastard who hits you?"

"Because I don't know any better!" She shouts bluntly, burying her face in her palms and starting to sob. "I don't know what I'd do without him…" Santana wraps her arms around Brittany and shushes her, "I'm nothing without him…"

"Brittany no, you'd be everything you're not now without him. You'd be confident, and fearless, and independent, and strong… you wouldn't hurt so much either." Brittany pulls away, and she winces at the pain she feels when she does.

"What was that?"

"Nothing…"

"Britt…"

"It's nothing." Brittany crawls to the end of the couch and hugs herself.

She's so tired of crying.

Santana crawls with her until she's so close their breaths are touching with each pant between them,

"Can I see?" Santana's hands are playing with the hem of Brittany's shirt and waiting for Brittany to give her approval, when the blonde moves her arms and places them at her sides, Santana starts to pull her shirt up slowly. Her eyes widen when the bruises are visible and on display; their black and red and purple and stretch from Brittany's stomach to her left side. "Brittany…" Santana's voice cracks, how could someone do this to her. "Oh my god…" She whispers, she looks up at Brittany, who had tears clearly falling down her cheeks now, hitting the arm of the couch. The Latina takes her hand and ghost it over the bruises, her touches are light and she doesn't want to hurt her friend.

"Can you leave? I kind of just want to go to sleep…" She whispers. Santana sighs, nods her head and gets up quietly.

Later on that night she feels the bed dip on the other side of her, she turns to find Brittany looking at her with tear filled eyes. "C-can I sleep with you… please?" She asks in a barely audible voice. Santana gives her some cover a long with a pillow, she's surprised when she feels Brittany's body against the front of hers, but she wraps her arms around the blonde and holds onto her tightly. "It's ok," She tells her.

**Tell me what you think : )**

**Sorry for the mistakes, not time to proof read : (**


	5. I'm ready

Thank you to all the guest reviews! And I'm sorry for the confusion with the point of views last chapter, I usually tell you guys when I'm changing points of views because I think certain things sound better from certain people… Sorry again for the confusion.

**Caitie. **: You're doing wonders to my ego! Lmfao, thanks so much!

**GabrielaSnixx**: It will be! Everyone just has to stick around and wait! :)

/

Brittany hadn't left Santana's place in two weeks.

That was two weeks of peace and quiet.

Two weeks of her being able to breathe.

Two weeks of her not being afraid to turn the corner.

Two weeks of Santana taking care of her.

Two weeks of _Santana_.

But it was also two weeks of nonstop texts from Jared.

Phone calls at all hours of the night followed by angry, threating voicemails.

Two weeks of Brittany sleeping on edge because she thought Jared would find out where she was.

So maybe it wasn't totally peace and quiet; but it was better than what she was used to. In the back of Brittany's mind she knew that she'd have to go back to him. But the longer she waited the angrier she knew he would be when he got back.

Sometimes the voicemails weren't angry, sometimes they were soft and sweet. Desperate and urgent. "Britt, baby…" Jared whined. Brittany put it on speaker phone and exhaled. "I miss you… I-I know things weren't perfect between us but I need you to come back home." He paused, "This is where you belong. Here with me. I love you, you know I love you… I just want you to be safe." Santana pulls the curtain back and walks in with a glass of water. "Nothing is perfect when it comes to relationships baby, we have to try and get through it. Together." There's another pause and ruffling on the other end of the phone. "I have to get to class, I'll text you. Bye baby." Brittany's hands are shaking as she hangs up. Santana rolls her eyes and sits down on her bed next to Brittany.

"Did he leave that today?" Brittany nodded.

"A few seconds ago, actually."

"Don't listen to him." Santana says giving Brittany the glass of water. "Seriously, as soon as you go back he's going to hurt you… I couldn't handle that." She whispers as she takes Brittany's hand. "I think we should go and get all of your things when Puck and Sam get here tomorrow."

"San, no-"

"You said he has classes from like 5 to 9, that's enough time. We'll get a Uhal and be out in an hour."

"I can't-"

"Yes you can! You have to! I'm not letting you go back there. I'm not letting you go back to him!" Santana's frustration is getting the best of her and she's yelling now. "Hasn't this been nice? Living without fear? Living without regret." Santana takes her hands and places them underneath Brittany's stomach softly, "You're bruises are healing great, do you really just want to go and get some more? It'll only get worse if you go back Brittany."

"What am I going to do without him?" Brittany asks to herself mainly. Santana tucks a strand of hair behind Brittany's ear.

"We'll figure that out together. But you're not safe with him, and honestly? Now that you're in my life I refuse to let you go." Brittany leans down into Santana and smiles, placing her head on Santana's shoulder. "Why are you even with him, Britt?" Santana asks. "A girl like you deserves a guy that'll love her with everything they have, and take care of you… protect you. How'd an ass like him even get you?" Brittany pulls away and sits back against the bed, putting all of her weight on Santana's head board as she takes a deep breath.

"My dad's a lawer… and he works at Jared's dad's law firm-"

"His dad owns a law firm?"

"A chain of law firms, they're like everywhere: LA, Miami, Huston…"

"Wow…"

"Yeah and so I went up to the firm to visit my dad one day, just to bring him lunch because he like never leaves the office so he never eats. And while I was there I ran in Michal Rigs, Jared's dad. After I left he asked my dad if I'd be interested in possibly going out with his son… it was my second senior year and I needed a date to prom so I said yeah. And when me and Jared met he was actually really sweet; he'd buy me stuff and call me a lot… he was protective. He didn't want me seeing other guys and I thought it was really cute… you know? But then he started to get mad at me for everything and before I knew it…here we are." Santana scooted over and sat next to Brittany once more.

"When was the first time he hit you?"

"A while after we had made it official… we went out and he had went to the bathroom. When he got back there was this guy talking to me… I swear, I wasn't flirting with him, I was telling him that I had a boyfriend and that I was was taken but he wouldn't back off. Jared came over and grabbed my arm and dragged me outside…" she paused and took a deep breath, allowing a tear to drop before she continued. "Um, he-he dragged me into this ally and slapped me. Reallly hard." Brittany looked up to see Santana clenching her jaw and balling her fist. "But he apologized as soon as it happened-"

"And I bet he told you it was your fault too, right? That you shouldn't have made him that mad?!" Brittany silently nodded her head. "Britt… it wasn't your fault. Jared has a problem that isn't yours…"

"Yeah but-"

"If I have to kidnap you to keep you from him: I will." Brittany laughed a little, and so did Santana. The blonde leans her head onto Santana's shoulder.

"I'll stay here." She glances up at her for a moment before returning her eyes to the bed spread. "We can go get my stuff tomorrow. You're right… I'm sick of being scared…"

"Good." Santana began to caress Brittany's hair while she looked down on her.

/

Even since Brittany snuck into Santana's bed that night two weeks ago, she'd slept there every night.

And Santana didn't mind.

She liked having Brittany close to her and surrounding her. She liked how the blonde smelled, and she enjoyed her warmth. She especially liked how Brittany would snuggle up to her and lay her head on her chest, then would wrap her arms around Santana's tiny waist, and Santana liked holding Brittany. They just meshed so well. But she hated how Brittany would stir in her sleep and mumble for Jared to stop. She hated how sometimes Brittany would jerk from her sleep crying and holding herself tightly. It broke her heart and made Santana want to break Jared's jaw. Stab him a few good times leave in for dead in a ditch. She hated that Brittany wouldn't be able to sleep sometimes because she was too scared Jared would find her and hurt her… or worse hurt Santana.

"So," Brittany started. It was 12 am that Saturday night and the two sat up in Santana's room with the TV on mute, the brightness from the screen being the only source of light in the room. "How'd you know you were gay?" Santana cocks an eyebrow and sits back against the head board, watching Brittany rock back and forth by her legs on the other end of the bed.

"How'd you know you were straight?" She shoots back, Santana hated that question. It's kind of like asking someone how they know if their girl or a boy; you just know. Sure, you can be in denial… but you are what you are. Brittany blushes and bows her head before she looks back up at Santana.

"C'mon… you know what I mean/" Santana sighs.

"It was innocent at first; I thought my teachers in pre-school were pretty, and soon I was the teacher's pet. I'd help them with boards and I'd be quiet during nap so Ms. Morris would rub my back; because only quiet kids got that reward." Santana smirked. "Um, when I hit elementary school it got worse because I started to think the girls in my classes were cute… at recess and we'd play tag I'd only chase the girls, I would let the girls I thought were cute cut me in the lunch line."She laughed before continuing. "Fast forward to middle school and shit started to get difficult. All my friends would talk about how cute the boys in our class were, and yeah, I agreed the boys were cute, I'm not blind… but I thought my friends were gorgeous. And when they would talk about how it would be to kiss a boy, I just wanted to know how it was to kiss a girl… they just looked so soft and sweet…" Brittany was watching Santana intently, kind of relating to her story; she'd thought boys and girls were cute. "I had a friend, a best friend, Amber. She was fucking adorable in every way possible. She was sweet and nice and we did everything together… we went everywhere together. We were inseperable." Santana paused, "I thought she would take me liking her well… maybe even like me back… so one day… I told her that I liked her and that I thought she was pretty… I told her I wanted to kiss her." Santana breaks the eye contact with Brittany so she can continue. "She um… she didn't take it well. She called me names… and she laughed at me. She told me I was weird and that girls don't like other girls and that she had a crush on this kid Jason and that she and Jason were "together". Then she got up and left… and she told a few people about my confession, and of course it got around." Brittany gasps and shakes her head.

"She was being a bitch." Santana snickered.

"Yeah, but I'm a bigger one. I denied everything; I made fun of her and said I was surprised that Jason wanted her. Um, she kept talking shit about me though, and I was getting so mad! We were so close and because I had a crush on her she just couldn't'… I didn't understand why it mattered… so I got back at her. I stole Jason from her. If they were together I'd sit on the other side of him and flirt with him… it didn't take long for his attention to be on me and he totally forgot about her, after that he broke up with Amber and he was like a love sick puppy; he was literally putty in my hands." Brittany starts to giggle and shakes her head again. "I didn't want him though, so unless she was around for a show I ignored him."

"So then what happened?"

"After that I never told another girl I liked her. When I got to high school I started going out with every seemingly popular guy… and things started to spiral out of control after that. Guys got sick of going out with me because I…we wouldn't do anything… I'd just have them take me to the movie, make out a little in their car or the movies but when they would try to… to do stuff I'd tell them no. After a while they got fed up with me, but it wasn't until I went out with this guy Chad. I was a freshmen and he was a senior, we were in his car and he started moving his hand up my skirt and I told him to stop, and he said to me, he said… 'Are you a dyke or something?' and I told him I wasn't but he kept saying it and teasing me so I let him… I let him do it. It was terrible, it hurt." Santana voice cracked, "It hurt so fucking bad…" Brittany crawls to Santana, straddling her and pulling the Latina into a warm hug as she whispers, "It's ok." Santana breathing hitches from the closeness of Brittany, god did she smell good. Brittany let's Santana go so she can continue. "I became numb to it all, the first few times I cried during… while they…. Yeah…" She couldn't finish her sentence. "But they never cared; no one ever cared… so I would imagine I was away, somewhere else. In my room watching Cameron Diaz and Drew Berrymore in Charlie's Angels or something." Santana chuckles, hoping to lighten the mood. "And then I joined glee club… and everyone there accepted me. They helped me come out and Rachel and Finn held my hand the entire way, even though I was such a bitch to them… but I was a bitch because I was angry and bitter, I was desperate for some kind of release and that was it. I pushed everyone away… but they wouldn't let me." Brittany nods her head as Santana speaks.

"So have you ever…?"

"Had a girlfriend? Yeah… Dani… but that's it. I've had like… a few one night stands but… nothing too serious." Santana looked exhausted and Brittany could tell that she didn't want to talk anymore. Her cheeks were red, along with her eyes and she was whipping furiously as her face trying to stop the tears.

"Lay down, we should sleep." Brittany says softly, "Calm down, San." Santana agree and gets under the convers as Brittany turns the TV off. And for the first time in two weeks Santana doesn't hold Brittany, Brittany pulls Santana's close and holds her.

No, Santana didn't mind Brittany staying her bed. She preferred it. It gave her more of an opportunity to be close to the blonde. Growing up, Santana watched her father take care of her mother, protect and serve her, please her. Her father gave her and her mother any and almost everything their hearts desired; he always said that his girls deserved the best. And when Santana came out her junior year, it was like her father was giving a speech to his son.

_Treat her with respect._

_It's your job to take care of her._

_Don't hurt her._

/

It was more than obvious to Santana that Brittany just wanted to be friends. They were friends. They were best friends. Just like her and Amber, but Santana didn't want to destroy their relationship like she did with her and Amber's. That would kill her. No, Santana was old enough to accept that Brittany was straight. She just wanted the blonde to be happy.

There was a blunt, loud knock on the door. Then another. Brittany jumped up and Rachel rushed out of her room. "They're here!" She shouted running to the door. When she saw Puck she screeched and jumped in his arms. "Noah!" She shouted, he put her down and Same got the same treatment as Kurt rushed out and hugged them as well.

"Where's my lezbro?" Puck asked opening his arms in wonder.

"I told you not to call me that!" Santana said coming out of her room in a pair of black sweats and a very tight, body hugging white beater with her hair up in a messy bun.

"Lezpez!" Puck charged at her and picked her up, spinning her around. Ever since graduation Santana and Puck had definitely gotten closer, they were like bro's now. Puck puts Santana down and looks at Brittany.

"Trouty mouth! Glad to see you." Santana says walking over to hug Sam but she stops when she gets closer and squints her eyes, "What the hell? Have your lips gotten bigger?"

"That's what I said!" Puck chimed, Rachel and Kurt look closely, thinking that just maybe-

"No!" Sam shouts. Brittany giggles and instantly gets everyone's attention, but she already had Puck's.

"I'm sorry, Sam, Puck… this is my friend Brittany. She's staying with us."

"You mean she's sleeping with you?" Puck asks.

"No." Santana says sternly. "She sleeps in my bed, but we're not together." At that moment Sam and Puck both charge to Brittany, trying to flirt but Santana's puts a quick stop to it. "Excuse me? She pulls Sam away from Brittany along with Puck. "No. Just. No."

"Why not?" Sam asks still eyeing Brittany with a smirk. "Hey, I'm Sam." He gives her a charming smile and shakes his hair out bit. "And these are good for much more than impressions." Santana blushes and rolls her eyes, her bitch side quickly shining through..

"I've had those froggy lips; not worth your time, Britt." She spits out in a harsh manner.

"San! You-"

"I faked it." Sam chuckles, figuring that he stepped into Santana's territory with Brittany. He puts his hands up in defense,

"Fine, fine." He looks at his ex and gives her a smile, "I'll back off." He says in her ear and Santana relaxes herself. She knows she shouldn't be jealous, Brittany's not into girls and she were to end up with a guy… why shouldn't it be Sam? Santana knew for a fake that Puck and Sam would be much better choices than Jared….

"Um…" She says through gritted teeth, pointing her direction at Sam.

"It's fine San." Brittany says getting up. "Hey guys." Rachel cuts in,

"You guys will be sleeping in-"Puck cuts her off,

"I'll sleep with Brittany." Santana can't stop herself from reaching up and slapping him hard in the back of his head and causing him to apologize quickly.

/

"And that's why we need to go get her things tomorrow." Puck and Sam both sit on the living room couch with Santana. She had just finished telling them the whole story about Brittany.

"This guys really did all that to her?" Sam asks Santana nods her head slowly; checking behind her to make sure Brittany was still in the shower.

"I can't let her go back there. He'll kill her. And then I'll kill him."

"Then we'd have to devise a plan to break you out of jail." Puck says seriously, making Sam laugh. "Don't worry San, we got this. We'll be in and out."

"Perfect."

/

The next morning they all left out as planned. Rachel and Kurt wanted to go but Santana told them they'd just be two huge childish distractions and that they'd be back in a while.

"Ok, Brittany go get your stuff. But only the important, like clothes… all that." Brittany nodded her head and dropped her duffle bag, letting it drag across the floor and into the master bed room.

"This is a nice set up," Puck says stuffing his hands in his pocket.

"Blah, blah," Santana says throwing them a few bags. "Here, go help Brittany pack some stuff. I'll get her things out of here." Puck and Sam agree, catching the bags and running into the bed room and bathroom to pack some things. Santana looks around and starts to grab a few things out of the living room.

"What the fuck?!" Santana hears a low whisper behind her. She freezes, feeling her bones go stiff but her legs turn to jell-O. She puts on as hard of a face as she can as she turns around to face Jared, "You're Brittany's friend. Where is she?" He's in her face quicker than she can breathe out an answer, but she can't find her voice. "Where is she!" He screams louder. Santana crosses her arms, unsure of how to get out of this situation. Jared looks down and see's the bag. "She's here, isn't she? Is she leaving?" He chuckles. "She's trying to leave me!" His voice is loud now.

Back in the room Brittany turns her head toward the door, "H-he's here." She begins to sob, "Fuck he's here." She drops the bags and starts to panic, "What are we going to do?" Puck raises an eyebrow.

"Santana!" He runs to the living room just as he hears Santana scream in pain and he hears a loud thud. When he gets to the living room he sees Santana on the ground, holding her face, tears threatening to fall from her eyes and Jared standing above her, yelling and shouting, raising his fist to hit her again, but Puck is quick and grabs him by his shirt: throwing hard into the floor. Brittany and Sam rub out next and Brittany drops to Santana.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry."

"I'm fine." Santana spits out, holding her cheek and refusing to look at Brittany.

"No you're not." Brittany cries. She didn't want Santana to get hurt. Jared is quick to get up and Puck is ready to hit him if he tries to strike again.

"Brittany! Get your ass over here!"

"Shut up!" Sam says helping Santana and Brittany up. "She's leaving. She doesn't need this." Jared chuckles,

"You're nothing, Brittany. You know that, you know you're nothing. You couldn't even graduate on time. You can't even keep up with your dance class." Brittany crosses her arms and bows her head, she didn't want to listen to Jared but it was so hard. "You're shit. No one's going to want you like me, no one's going to take care of you or care about you. You will have nothing without me." Jared starts to step closer to Brittany but Santana cuts her off.

"Brittany, don't listen to him, okay? Don't… you're perfect, you don't need him-"

"Are you going to listen to _her_? What does she know?" He looks at Santana and the way she's blocking Brittany from him. "Oh! Oh! I get it, she turned you out." He laughs a little harder. "Do you think she could protect you? Do you think she can save you?" He pushes Santana out of the way and quickly and grabs Brittany's arm, pulling her up to him. "You're mines, do you understand?" He asks Brittany in a low, forceful voice. But the blonde shakes her head.

"No… I'm not." It's at that moment that Sam hit Jared hard in the back of the head, causing him to tumble to the ground in pain. Brittany breaks from his grasp as Puck kicks him hard in the ribs. "I'm not-not yours. I'm not." Brittany says in a whisper. "I'm leaving! I'm not yours… I don't want to be!" She says louder.

"Go get the rest of your things." Sam says, he looks over to find Puck still hitting Jared, but Jared is no longer moving. "Puck! Chill!" Santana crawls over and checks his pulse.

"He's still alive, you just knocked him unconscious trouty mouth. Good job." Brittany comes out with a three bags,

"I'm ready…"

/

**Thoughts please!**

**Sorry for any mistakes, I just finished this chapter and I really wanted to get it up tonight. **


	6. Make no mistake She's mine

**I'm sorry for the wait on this chapter, but it's longer than the other ones; 13 pages! Whoop whoop!**

**A/N: There's some slight bram in this but nothing that you can't stand; this is a Brittana story! Or Santity. : D Enjoy!**

**/**

**Santana's POV**

I've never considered myself a jealous person. I'm not. I could honestly give a shit about who dates who and who likes who.

That was until Brittany. Sure, I'd acted jealous plenty of times when I was dating Puck and Sam, even Finn once or twice, but I never really cared. But with Puck and Sam visiting and staying in the house; their all over Brittany. It's pretty obvious that she's not into me. She's always giggling around them; she soaks up the attention they give her like a fucking sponge.

And there's nothing I can do about it.

I think she likes Sam the most. Him and those damn impressions, she always laughs at them.

I want to make her laugh.

That's another damn thing; why the hell are they still here? I asked Rachel and she said they'd be gone in a week, but Sam is thinking about moving up here to be close to Brittany.

Bitch. Swerve!

She's mines, even if she's not _really_ mines; she can't be his either!

At this very moment we're all watching Insidious 2. I'm on the couch with Brittany right next to me and Sam on the other side of her. Puck is on the love seat with Berry and Blain came to visit Kurt. Everyone's cuddled up but me, but I should be.

_With Brittany._

Something happens in the movie an Rachel and Brittany scream; Kurt too. And I can't help but smile when Brittany practically jumps in my lap.

That's right goupy mouth. She jumped in my lap.

Not yours.

_Mines._

/

"San!" Brittany calls, running into my room later on the next morning. "Do you want breakfast? I know you have work in like four hours but you like to shower and get all pretty before you leave, so I was going to cook you some now." She asks. I flutter my eyes open, peeking out from the covers that are over my head. But the sight in front of me forces me to open my eyes wider and fast, I tug the covers off: There Brittany is in only a very, very, very short pair of black shorts and a hot pink tank top. Her shirt hugs her body so nicely that it rises up just enough to show a hit of the pale skin between the top of her shorts and the bottom of her shirt. "Santana?"

"Um, what? Breakfast… yes!" She smiles at me and feel my heart melt and sink in my stomach. She turns on her heels and skips down the hallway. I collapse on my bed, pulling myself together before I throw on an old red McKinley high shirt, with letters that I cut into a crop shirt and my black sweat pants and chase after Brittany. When I get into the kitchen Brittany is sliding around in her socks, dancing to Blurred lines. She's singing in the spatula and twisting her feet around; but she's still so damn graceful. Her hair is hanging down freely, flying back and forth as she moves. I lean against the wall dig my hands in the pockets of my sweats. God, why's she so damn pretty.

"Do you wanna cook with me?" I can tell it's not a question by the way she's pulling me into the kitchen. "I'm making pancakes the real way."

"The real way?"

"You know, with flour." I raise an eyebrow,

"We have the mix…"

"I wanna make you pancakes from scratch!" She argues and I chuckle,

"Ok, ok… do you know how to."

"What's there to know?" She slides to the counter to pick up the pack of flour, then to the sink to get a bowl. She slides and stops in front of me. I'm so distracted by her smile…

She throws flour in my face. Dead in my face. She's giggling now and I'm too shocked to really move.

"What the hell Britt?" I ask as I shake the flour from my face and hair.

"Nothing." She laughs and slides away from me. I smile and grab her wrist; she loses her balance and falls the floor, pouring the flour over herself in the process.

"Now it's nothing." I say laughing at her. She's trying to get it out… well of everywhere because now she's covered in flour. But I pick up a handful and throw it at her anyway.

"Santana!" She screams, "Not fair! You grabbed me."

"Prove it!" I scream running to the other end. Brittany picks up some flour and runs over to me, I grab the cutting board and block it from hitting my face again. She's laughing loudly now and so am I. I look over and pick as egg, chucking it at her legs and hitting her thigh. "Score!" I call,

"It's cold!" She cries,

"Maybe you should have on pants," I shrug. She shakes her head and grabs an egg as well, but when she throws it she misses and hits one of the cabinets.

"Stop being destructive." I tease and she covers her mouth.

"Rachel's going to be so-"I stop her sentence when I hit her dead in the face with another hand of flour. "Santana!"

"I love when you scream my name," I laugh, she pouts and tackles me to the ground but I can't stop laughing and neither can she. Just then the song changes and Soul sister comes on. "Wow this is old…" I say between my laughs.

"You're a soul sister, right?!" She shouts, that damn smile still distracting me.

"Um yeah, you could say that." I giggle, she grabs my hands and pulls me back up to the ground as we begin to dance and she sings along,

"_Your sweet moonbeam_

_The smell of you in every single dream I dream_

_I knew when we collided you're the one I have decided_

_Who's one of my kind_" We start to twist our feet back and forth, not once letting go of each other's hands but pulling apart, just for us to pull each other back.

"_Just in time, I'm so glad you have a one track mind like me_

_You gave my life direction_

_A game show love connection, we can't deny I I-I-I-I_" I can't stop giggling as she sings to me, she's so damn cute. We start to sway side to side and she turns me around as she continues to sing,

" _I'm so obsessed_

_My heart is bound to beat right out my untrimmed chest" _

She pops her chest out a few times, placing her hand on her heart like a heartbeat and I seriously think someone just turned up the heat in this room as she takes my hands again.

"_I believe in you, like a virgin, you're Madonna_

_And I'm always gonna wanna blow your mind"_

Brittany spins us both around, pulling me away from her and then closer, away, then closer, we step together, dancing like we do this every morning.

"_Hey soul sister, ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo_

_The way you move ain't fair you know_

_Hey soul sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you do tonight_

_The way you can cut a rug_

_Watching you is the only drug I need_

_Some gangster, I'm so thug_

_You're the only one I'm dreaming of_

_You see I can be myself now finally_

_In fact there's nothing I can't be_

_I want the world to see you'll be with me" _

Brittany brings me back into her, but now neither of us is laughing anymore because we're too busy staring at each other. Like hard, for some reason we're breathing hard and I'm not sure if it's because of the dancing or if it's because the air in this room just got so fucking thick. Brittany slips her from my hands and up my arms, snaking them up and around my neck. I follow her lead and wrap my hands around her waist, pulling her slightly, our fronts touching perfectly now. Even covered in flour she's fucking stunning and I lean in; slowly, giving her time to push me away if she wants. But she doesn't, and right before our lips touch…

"What the hell did you guys do!" Rachel yells bursting into the kitchen. Brittany and me pull apart quickly, but the mess in the kitchen seems to have gotten everyone's attention.

"We were making pancakes." Brittany says innocently.

"Britt, this is not how you make pancakes!" She says.

"Hey…" Sam says, he looks around and then his eyes land on Brittany and me. "Um, Brittany do you want to go out for breakfast?" He asks. Brittany doesn't bother to look at me; she smiles and nods her head. I'm flustered, I'm frustrated, and I'm confused and kind of angry now.

"Well I'm showering first, I have to get ready for work and catch two trains. It'll take me an hour to get this crap off." I say as I exit the kitchen and head to the bathroom.

"Who the hell is going to clean this up?" I hear Rachel scream.

"Take one for the team, Berry!" I shout back.

/

"_She got me up all night, all I'm singing is love songs. She got me up all night, constant drinkin' and love songs. She got me up all night, down and out with these love songs, she got me up all night drowning out with these love songs_." I rap as I'm on the last train to work and looking out the window. Sam. Fucking Sam. I roll my eyes; Brittany probably was just playing around with me or something. She didn't want me. And I'm pretty damn stupid to think any different. We're friends. I may have helped her out of Jared's house but that doesn't mean we're anymore, or any less. We're simply friends.

But the way she was looking at me…

"_Would you believe me if I said I'm in love? Baby, I want you, to want me… Baby… I want cha…_" The train comes to a stop and I fix my uniform before I get off of the train, my music still in and my mind still scrambled. What was wrong with me? Sure, I'm a girl but… I could be 10x the man Sam would ever be, and still have all the qualities of a woman. Like for instance: I shower every day, and I can cook the hell out of a chicken. I've been told that I tend to smell like strawberry vanilla, and I can give Brittany pleasure that Sam can't even fathom: even with those ginormous lips.

So why the hell wouldn't she want me. I was just as good as he was…

Right?

"_Well this has got to be the longest crush ever, if I ever get to fuck it'll be the longest bust ever. Love is a drug like the strongest stuff ever and fuck it, I'm all one, you feel me? She on a power trip she got me where she want a nigga wifein in the club and my hommies gon disown a nigga. I'm in your city and I'm wondering if your home now, went and found a man but I'm hoping you're alone now. Can't help but feelin' like I dropped the ball, cliché, I used to pop up on you at the mall each day. Now typically I kick game like East Bay, but you got a nigga freeze-framed yelling please play,. For Pete's sake, homie, pull it together_."

/

During work I keep looking over at the bar counter because that's where usually sits. I give her about $20 and she buys herself lunch, then she tips me and I get to stare at as I rush back and forth with people's food and drinks. But not today because she's with him. I'm standing with my chin in my hand while I rest my elbow on the counter; business being slow isn't with my depression right now.

"Hey Lezpez." I look up to find Puck sitting down on the other end of the counter,

"I'm not afraid to cut you in public," I tell him,

"Chill. I came to talk."

"Order or get out. You and Sam have both already overstayed your welcome at my home. At least me a lone here."

"Give me a beer-"

"You're not 21."

"So?"

"I don't like you enough right now to help you do illegal shit."

"Alright, I'll have a lemonade." He smiles. I walk and get him his drink in our shitiest glass.  
"Are you upset because your girl Britt is all over Sam's-"I put my notepad to his neck, making him look at me with curious eyes,

"I will slit your neck with this paper if you finish that sentence." He chuckled and puts his hands up in defense.

"I'm sorry; if it makes you feel better I don't like her. Well, she's hot and all but she's all yours. I'll back off."

"You both said that three weeks ago."

"In our defense, you two seem like best friends."

"We are," I shrug, "I just want more."

"Well, what about her?"

"I have no fucking idea."

"So ask…"

"I'm not good with this direct shit, okay Puck? I've only had one girlfriend and she was a huge mistake. Everyone one else was experimenting or they were just horney."

"Just say 'Yo, Britt, whats up?'"

"No." I say flatly, returning to my original position.

"Why can't you two just leave? Seriously, Brittany and me were fine until he came here."

"Don't blame Sam because you have no game-"

"I have game, okay?!" I snap back.

"Then spit some and claim what's yours." He finishes his ice tea and give me a $10 bill. "Keep the change and I'll see back at home."

"Shut up." I mumble as he heads out the door.

/

"Later Gunther," I call over my shoulder after I've changed out of my uniform and left it in my cubby we have in the back, and when I turn my head I'm facing Brittany sitting at the bar.

"Hey," She smiles at me. Damn it, I was prepared to be angry at least until I got home.

Well, that plans out the window.

"Hi," I say shyly walking from behind the counter and up to her.

"I wanted to walk you home, in case it gets dark fast…"

"That was sweet, thanks." I tell her and I can't stop smiling like a fool, Brittany looks absolutely perfect sitting on the stool. Her hair isn't just hanging down now, it's sitting in up in subtle curls, one side pulled back behind her hair with a black hairclip. She's wearing a pair of dark skinny jeans with a cropped, peach colored tribal print shirt with black patterns, with black combat boots. As pretty as she looks I can't help but get upset thinking about the fact that she only looks so nice because she went out with Sam earlier.

"Where's Sam?" I asks as she gets up and we head out the door.

"He dropped me off a few minutes ago and he headed back home."

"Oh, so you've been hanging out with him all day?" I ask for clarification and she nods her head.

"It was fun; I like your friends." She giggles.

"Mhm, I wish I could say the same." I roll my eyes kind of picking up my speed.

"You're walking fast." Brittany says in a huff as she picks up her pace too to match mines.

"Sorry, I just really want to catch this train. Of we catch the S train then we won't have to catch two trains home because it takes us a lot closer and we just walk that block up to the loft." She nods her head, struggling keep up with me still. I sigh and slow down.

"Thanks," She whispers,

"I'd hate to turn around you're not behind me." I say looking at all the people on the streets right now. It's always crowded around this time or more crowded anyway. "How was your day with Sam?" I ask wanting to know what they did.

"Um, first we went to breakfast and he paid and I told him I'd pay him back as soon as I get a job… which is going to be soon; I promise." I node my head at her, Brittany's been feeling bad about stay with us and not paying anything but I don't mind .I've told her that. It's fun having her around, but I get why she wants a job. It's a pride thing: She feels I've done too much for her. "And we talked a bit, and then I we walked around and caught a few trains, then we went to Central park and we just hung out there and then I came to see you."

"Sounds like fun," I'm being sarcastic but I don't think Brittany picked up on it and she just agrees with me. I take a deep breath and let it out,

"Can I hold your hand?"

"What?" She asks me slowly. Either she wasn't paying attention or she disgusted,

"T-to cross the street… I don't want to lose you." I half lie. She smiles and nods her head taking my hand as we cross the long New York street. It took me a minute but I let go once we're on the other side and down to the subway station.

/

The next hour on the train Brittany and I talk about any and everything. She tells me about her classes and she tells me a bunch of corny jokes. I tell her about my classes and an audition I have coming up the week after next. Then she tells me about all the places she's applied to so far and that no one's called her back. I tell them because they know they're not awesome enough for her. We whisper about the old lady on the train who reminds Brittany of the old lady that swallowed a fly and I can't help but laugh so loudly we get everyone on the train's attention.

We missed the S train so we're waiting on the second train, it's getting kind of chilly out and I notice Brittany shivering and nuzzling closer to me. "Here," I say shrugging off my black hoodie and draping it on Brittany's shoulders.

"Now you're going to be cold." I chuckle,

"I have on a real shirt though." Brittany just snuggles in closer to me, resting her head on my shoulder, and it takes everything in me not put my hands on her hips and just hold her until our train gets here.

But I like this

"I wish they'd stop staring at us," Brittany says in a whisper, I look around to find a group of guys looking at us and laughing.

"Just ignore them, Britt." I tell her, I can feel her shaking now and she wraps her arms around my neck. I sigh and put my arms around her waist, "They're just guys; the most they'll do is try and talk to us." I whisper in her ear.

"I don't know why I'm scared…." She tells me,

"It doesn't matter," I tell her, "I have razor blades in my hair." Seriously, I do. She giggles a bit and when I see our train pulling up I grab her hand and we run to jump on.

/

**Brittany's POV**

My day with Sam was fun but it wasn't amazing. I missed being with Santana while she worked, that was the time I got to just stare at her and watch her move. The way she would twirl around and hand people their food, or how she would insult those who asked her to take their food back. It was the time that made my day. So when Sam asked me if I wanted to go out to dinner I made up a lie and told him that I promised Santana that I would meet her at the Spotlight diner. I wanted to see her, I needed to see her.

Right now Santana and Puck are sitting on the floor playing Call of Duty and I'm sitting on the couch watching her. Anybody else would be bored watching them, but I like being able to stare at Santana without her noticing. That way it's not awkward and I don't look too weird. "Puck, what the _fuck _are you _doing_? You're killing us!" She shouts and reaches over, slapping him in the back of the head and I giggle a bit. Puck sighs and shoots one of the guns, I guess.

"Why don't you get out of the game and let me handle this?" He says as he pauses the game. They both stare at each other, like they're having a silent conversation and Santana eventually puts the controller down.

"Fine." She sits down by me and Puck un pauses the game.

"Hey!" He shouts turning to look at us but mostly looking at Santana. "You guys could go watch a movie in _your_ room! Maybe like, oh I don't know a scary movie? Or a sappy movie, they're both good." He winks at her and Santana's lips are pressed together in tight frown as they stare at each other again. Both their eyes growing wider as the staring continues.

"Um, I'm cool with that. I don't wanna watch Puck kill people anyway." I say finally breaking their glares and Santana looks at me.

"Ok…" We get up and head to Santana's room.

/

After a hard debate we agreed on the notebook, and as much as I wanted to cuddle into Santana on her bed I didn't. It was fine doing it when were sleep because I was scared and I trusted her to protect me, but in the dark while watching a movie… I couldn't.

This morning was fun… but I wasn't expecting what happened. I didn't plan to have a flour fight but…

When Santana and I almost kissed I felt my heart stop, I felt myself giving into an emotion I've never felt before and it was scary. But I wanted to give in. I wanted Santana to kiss me and leave me in a puddle on the kitchen floor. But Santana can do better than me. And she doesn't want me. Why would she? I'm damaged goods. Everything about me is damaged. I still have nightmares about Jared at night, and when I wake up she just shushes me and holds me until I fall asleep again. She tells me everything's okay.

But everything's not okay.

I'm falling for a woman I can't have because she can have anyone in this world.

/

After classes the next day when Santana and me got off campus Sam was waiting out by the gates.

"Hey!" He says running over to us, "Britt, I wanted to know if you might have wanted to catch a movie with me?" I look over at Santana who is now giving Sam the death glare but he doesn't seem to notice, and before I can answer she interrupts,

"Brittany and I are going to the café today. I'm off of work and _we_ already made plans." He nods his head understanding.

"Maybe later on tonight-"

"Brittany has am 8am dance class tomorrow. She can't do anything tonight." Santana spits back at him, her and Sam do the same thing she and Puck were doing the night before. I like that Santana looks out for me and she has my best interest at heart; not many people do.

"Santana's right," I cut in, "I have to get to bed kind of early tonight or else I won't wake up to catch the train or I'll be too tired to pay attention to what we're doing in class."

"Okay that's cool. Maybe I could-"

"Oh my god! Nooooo!" Santana whines, she's pouting now, her hands folded tightly around her chest.

"I was going to ask if I could come to café, Brittany told me a lot about it yesterday-"

"Can you stop talking?" Santana fires back, not removing her eyes from him once.

"I don't see why you can't come. They have really good drinks, I promise." And with that I take both their hands and we start down the street.

**Santana's POV**

Brittany excuses herself to go to the bathroom once we've ordered our drinks, and right when she's out of sight Sam and me are glaring at each other.

"Look, trouty mouth. I get that you like Brittany, I mean who wouldn't but the thing is: she's mines. And you being something like a friend to me I'd appreciate it if you backed the hell off." I tell him as soon as she's out of ear shot.

"Santana, she doesn't want you. Have you forgotten that there are a lot of straight girls out there-"

"I don't care about that. You can't have her."

"And what are you going to do with her?" He asks folding his arms.

"First, I'm going to remove the Sam size tumor on her heart." He blinks a few times, scrunching his face.

"Did you just call me a tumor?"

"And then we can start the long, slow process of washing the stench of you out of her. God, I already have to help heal her from Jared; you're not helping."

"Look, it's obvious that we both care about her-"

"No Sam, I care about her, you have a crush on her and really, it's adorable to watch you follow her around like a little golden retriever puppy that's had three too many lip injections because god knows that once was already pushing it and makes them look like the male version of Angelina Jolie who, by the way, makes your lips look a lot better than you do. But it's time to stop. It's getting a little pathetic."

"Me? I'm pathetic? Did you not hear what you just said to me-"

"It is! The way you showed up today, how you kidnapped her last night-"

"I didn't kidnap her!"

"Um, yeah you did." Just then our drinks come.

"-I'll pay for hers!" We both say at the same time, grabbing Brittany's bill.

"Santana, really, I'll pay."

"Froggy lips, seriously, I don't mind."

"But I insist."

"I don't give a hot wet monkeys ass what you insist." I hiss, making out waitress laugh. "Drop the damn bill!"

"I want to pay."

"Sam!"

"Guys…" Brittany's walking over to us, her eyes on our hands that are both still gripping onto the bill. "What are you doing?" she asks sitting down by me.

"I was just saying I was going to pay for your drink, Brittany." Sam says,

"But then he remembered that his broke ass doesn't have enough for both drinks and I'm damn sure not buying his so we agreed that I will." And with that I snatch the bill from and go into my wallet.

"Um, thanks… to the both of you…" Brittany says slowly looking back and forth at us.

**Brittany's POV**

Santana's tells me that it's no problem and that she doesn't mind paying stuff for me, but her and Sam are seriously having the stare down of the century. Santana pushed Sam so she could hold the door open, but after I walked through she let it slam in his face, and then Sam attempted to run pass Santana to get my chair but she tripped him and he fell again.

Sam's a nice guy and his impressions are funny. He's sweet and he holds me close when we walk together, but Santana sets my skin on fire with her touch, and her laugh is like music to my ears, and I love hearing her insult people because she's so good at it. And me and Santana can dance and sing together.

When I wake up I just look at her and I can't believe I'm so lucky to even have her in my life. And before I got to sleep I make sure she's next to me because she makes the bed warmer.

The ride home on the Subway wasn't much better. They raced to get a seat by me but Sam beat Santana this time, so she sat in the seat in front of us. She kept her body turned toward me the whole time and we talked and laughed like we always do the subway while Sam had his arm around me. When he first put it there I thought Santana was going to bite it off the way she scowled at him. But she didn't.

/

Around 8 pm I'm in the bathroom with only my bra and a pair of Santana's sweat pants on, I'm examining my body, touching the healed skin where my scars and bruises used to be. "Hey, Britt I brought you a towel for your hair-"she stops once she enters and we lock eyes, "I'm sorry." She said shyly putting the towels down.

"No," I tell her. I walk closer to her and take her hand, placing it on my sides. "They're gone." I whisper. She smiles at me and starts to rub my sides soothing; making me gaps and let out a sharp breath,

"I'm glad they're gone. You didn't deserve them." She says to me. I can't help but break our eyes contact and I look down at the ground. "Hey," Santana moves her head so that our eyes meet again, "You didn't." She says a little slower. I nod my head, still not believing it. I did deserve them. And sometimes I still think that I deserve Jared. I don't deserve someone like Santana. I start to shake my head, tears falling as I do.

"Yeah I did."

"No!" She says kind of loud. "You didn't. Brittany, if anything he deserves for me to shot him in the balls for making you think you deserve anyone like him. You don't." She says holding me close. "You don't…" she says again. "You deserve someone who treats you right." She says, "Someone like Sam-"

"Huh?"

"Sam…" She closes her eyes like it's killing her to say it. "He's a good guy and he likes you. You deserve someone like… him… I guess."

"Yeah, maybe." I say and it gets quiet.

"W-what's wrong with me?" She asks in a quiet voice and forces my head to snap up.

"W-what?"

"What's wrong with me? I mean… I told you I like you like last month and you kind of just… ignored it. I-is it cuz I'm a girl because-"

"No!" I say to her. "No… I'm not-I don't… we can't… you can do better than me." I stutter out, "You can have anyone you want-"

"But I don't want anyone. I want you… just you."

"You can't. You shouldn't. I-I'm broken, I'm damaged… no one should want me."

"What the hell are you talking about?" She asks me, walking a little closer to me.

"I like you, I really do but I know I'm not worth it. I have nightmares about him, I flinch when people raise their hands to me, I can't be alone. You don't need me in your life-"

"But I do! Brittany, I absolutely need you in my life. I do…" She whispers, but I just shake my head. "Stop it, okay? Stop it…" She says in a low voice, "What do I have to do to prove to you that you are so special… and so beautiful… and so smart and perfect."

"Nothing, you can't say anything to make me believe that because none of it is true." And just like that all the air from my lungs is taken away by Santana reaching up and kissing me softly, gently on the lips. She presses her full lips against mines in such a way that I feel like I'm going to pass out. She pulls away after a second,

"How about that?" I don't bother to answer her, I push up into a wall as gently as I can and I kiss her back. Her lips taste like the sweetest of wines that's probably illegal in America and I'll never get to taste, but Santana is close enough. Our kiss stays sweet and slow. Santana slips her tongue out and swipes it over my lips a few times, waiting for me to open my mouth a little to let her in, so I do and once her tongue is stroking its way in and out of my mouth I lose my balance and fall forward, using the wall for support. I hear her giggle a little and she places her hands on my hips, pushing me forward and lifting me on the sink. She pulls me forward and I wrap my legs around her waist, she leans up and kisses me sweetly as I place my hands on her shoulders and I can feel myself catching on fire and my breathing getting rigid so I pull away, but she just kisses my cheek, then my jawline, and finally she starts to suck on my neck.

"S-Santana…" I say slightly pushing her away. I can feel her smiling on my neck as her kisses stop.

"Yeah?" She asks, looking up at me and pecking me once on the lips.

"That was nice." I giggle and she laughs too.

"It was…"

"But maybe we should stop." She looks at the position we're in with the bathroom door wide open.

"Mhm, that's probably a good idea." She backs aways just enough for me to hop down off the counter,

"And I need to take a shower," I say letting my hands fall to the top of her chest as I bite my lip. I can't stop smiling and neither can she.

"Mhm." She says leaning in and kissing my cheek.

"So…"

"Oh… right," She laughs and starts to back away. "I'll see you when you get out." I nod my head,

"Yeah, you will."

/

**:D Chapter 6 everyone.**

**OMG who absolutely loved the episode on Tuesday night? Because when Santana sang I literally fainted on my couch and turned into a puddle. God, I love Naya! **

**Anyway, tell me your thoughts on this chapter or that episode….**

**Bye! **


	7. sorry

Hi everyone, I'm sorry to say that I have no idea where to go in this story, I had all these things and situations and what not planned for Brittana when they got together but not I'm kind of stuck. So with that being said, this story is put on pause. I'm not sure for how long, but I'm sure it won't be a year or anything like that. Um, I just need to get my creative juices flowing so I'm going to take some time before I start this story back up. When I do I'll delete this post and replace it with a real chapter. Till next time, bye! 


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